"I've been mauling him for ages - WHY ISN'T HE DEAD YET?!"

#catsofcoso​
#bengals​
#bengalcats​

Left a plate on the stove; left the room, returned minutes later to find this.

Yes: that is a catnip mouse on a plate on the (cold) stove.

I...think they're trying to prepare their own food...? 😸

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals
#Bengalcat
#Caturday

I am willing to admit that, at *times*, I *MAY* have over-exaggerated the ferocity of my cats.

Just slightly.

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals​​
#Bengalcat

Currently trying to survive a VICIOUS & SAVAGE #Bengalcat attack.

If you don't hear from me again, it means the cats won 😱😸

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals​​

"Day 1,826: my attempts at causing this wretched human to die by making him overheat have failed; for the time being, my brother is currently testing his organs for weaknesses, and with any luck, we can rid ourselves of this awful human soon enough..."

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals​
#Bengalcat​

"Why do I steal your seat when you get up...? Because I can."

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals​
#Bengalcat​
#PissyCat

I DEMAND FOOD AT MIDNIGHT

THE CLOCK SAYS 20 MINUTES PAST

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals​
#Bengalcat​

Definitely NOT a lapcat 😸

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals​
#Bengalcat​

Feline Services Telegram (FST):

HAVE ALREADY LEFT OCELOT-SIZED DUMP IN CATBOX WILL LAUGH WATCHING YOU CLEAN IT UP STOP

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals
#Bengalcat

Feline Services Telegram (FST):

ATE SNACK AT 11 PM SO ENSURE BREAKFAST IS READY AT 6 AM PROMPT STOP

THIS HEATING PAD PROVIDES MORE HEAT THAN YOUR FEEBLE HUMAN BODY CAN NO NEED TO SLEEP IN YOUR BED STOP

PLEASE DO NOT USE ME AS A REFERENCE STOP

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals
#Bengalcat

Singha's current tactic during this week's version of The Ottoman Wars is to just plant his huge ass on top of Ausar until he moves 😹😹😹

Clearly, he's had limited success with this tactic; his brother doesn't even seem to care 🙄

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals
#Bengalcat

Singha had to get his daily exercise in to work up his appetite 🙄😹

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals
#Bengalcat

So, when the cats head-butt me in the face, I began swiftly punishing them by kissing them on the head; regrettably, this appears to have proven an inadequate tactic, as now, THEY ONLY DO IT MORE.

It's as if they *like* it, so...I'm open to suggestions as to ways to appropriately dissuade them.

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals​
#Bengalcat​
#SevereCatAbuse

So, when cats blink at you slowly, that means they're just about to attack you, right...?

*sighs*

I can't afford to take chances, so I'm just gonna call animal control for my own safety. Doubt there's any trade-in value on this pair anyway.

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals are furry little MONSTERS
#Bengalcat

The Cat In The High Castle

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals
#Bengalcat
Yeah, I missed #Caturday again, I know

"Using my natural camouflage, combined with the human's dreadful taste in tacky pillows, I have finally achieved complete invisibility."

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals
#Bengalcat

I fell asleep on the couch, woke up to Singha glaring at me; I suspect he is beyond perturbed that I remain alive, as he was probably looking forward to a warm meal 😾

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals
#Bengalcat

Oh shit: it appears the cats have figured out when I spell the word "food" that means food, so...I'm now under a severe Cat Attack.

Gonna start spelling it "fewd" to see if I can throw them off a bit longer...

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals
#Bengalcat

"Well, we already woke him up OVER AN HOUR EARLY for our 6am meal; let's go back to sleep on the heating pad for now."

Furry little sociopaths 😾

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals​ are monsters
#Bengalcat​

THANKZ 2 ALL THESE EXTRA HEATING PADZ, WE NO LONGER NEED JAY FOR BODY HEAT.

NO WORRIEZ. JAY IZ GUD. HE WAS ACSHUALLY DELISHUS

#Catsofcoso
#Bengals
#Bengalcat