Is it just me? 🤔 A serious question.
I was talking to a friend of mine, a woman of color, who is setting up a consultancy to help trauma survivors. I commented that what hurts one, hurts all, whether in our community, our country or our world. This seems self evident and obvious to me, but she mentioned that it is a foreign concept to many. So I thought i'd ask the CoSo community, is it just me who believes this or do others view it the same way?
I believe this as well. I also believe that sometimes to heal, you must first hurt.
Some parts of us must be destroyed so the body can heal. Like with Cancer.
The same is true of Society, in my opinion.
@killingfloorman there are people with empathy & people who either had empathy beaten out of them or were born psychopaths... so, no, unfortunately, it's not self-evident to some people
@killingfloorman what do you mean?
@opheliakami I mean that if a person is hurt, emotionally, physically, spiritually, financially etc, it has a negative impact on all of us one way or another
@killingfloorman
I agree with you, I believe we cannot hurt others without hurting some part of ourselves too. Even in the most "obvious" circumstances where we have to engage in self-defense. Letting that hate in is actually damaging to us.
@killingfloorman Trauma has the ripple effect in communities not just one person is affected. All of us are. You're right.
@killingfloorman
Absolutely!!
@killingfloorman People who think their trauma responses mean they are strong, but in a normal situation they just look like a massive jerk, they hurt many. Those whose trauma response is to pacify, they promote acceptance of bad behavior, causing harm. What hurts me the most is knowing all the pain out there, and feeling helpless about it. I have to shut part of myself off to cope with it, so yes it's a truth, and no, there will always be some who can't accept truth so not always self evident.
If you ask a person of color, they will have a different opinion.
@LnzyHou all of them would have the same opinion? 🤔 i didn't really get what you were saying, sorry.
@killingfloorman Minorities (particularly PoC) are less apt to have been treated as though their struggles matter so won't have experienced that attitude as often. @LnzyHou
My point exactly. It doesn’t matter what we white people think in a discussion with POC.
They have reasons to not adopt a more metaphysical approach to the topic.
As long as they must have “the talk” with their kids, we are not on a level playing field.
My white sons have never had the talk.
@killingfloorman
We all do better, when we all do better. That's a fact.
@killingfloorman Evident to most here, but she is right... and it is getting worse.
@killingfloorman
great question...personally think it's true but also think a service-oriented mindset is sorely diminshed in our society at this point in time, and further, the experience of oppressed communities in this regard is complicated - as suggested by your friend's comment
@killingfloorman I certainly do but there seems to be an entire generation that has a ‘me only’ attitude. Hopefully we can turn that around.
@killingfloorman
“An injury to one is an injury to all.”
I believe this with all my heart.