@ordenauta 'When Chuck Norris walks into a room, even silence bows down in awe.'

Just before I turn in for the night in my cot, I'll say I just re-upped my Pro for this month, and if you can afford the five bucks please consider doing it because it keeps this place running and special for all of us.

XX

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel hanging out of his pants.

The bartender gives him an odd look and asks "Hey mate, what's with the steering wheel?"

The pirate replies, "Arrrr.. It's driving me nuts!"

#ChuckNorris has a grizzly bear rug in his bedroom.

It's not dead. It's just too scared to move.

If you had $5 and #ChuckNorris had $5, Chuck Norris would have more money than you.

When Alexander Graham Bell invented the phone, he had three missed calls from #ChuckNorris

New York City once named a road #ChuckNorris Street but it had to be renamed when nobody could cross it.

#ChuckNorris was born in a log cabin that he built with his own hands.

#ChuckNorris threw a grenade. Fifty terrorists died. Then the grenade exploded.