4: Wookie meat is a bit chewie.

3: Garden statues being mistaken for elves is a common misgnomer.

2: My local baker loves making pastries in a wood-fired oven.

He's both a pyromancer and a pie romancer.

1: Don’t worry, things will get batter. Baking is the yeast of my problems. Even though I’m well bread, I kneaded the dough. At least I’m not a French baker. That would be pain every day. Well, at least I have flours. It’s breadtime now. These puns are getting stale.

4: Training snorkelers is a tankless task.

3: Jesus: Another water please?

Bartender: Not this shit again...

If you have a pizza with radius Z and thickness A, it's volume is = Pi x Z x Z x A

#CoSoMusic
Don McLean still sounded pretty good for a guy in his 70s a couple of years ago. Have a listen and a look at Home Free - American Pie ft. Don McLean (Official Music Video) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9RlTZdYXcKg

2: Went looking for a book on how to fix automatic gearboxes, but could only find manuals.

1: Annemarie Schrödinger: Erwin, what have you done to the cat?
It looks half dead!

4: Q: Why did the chicken have a keynote remote?

A: To get to the other slide.

3: The conductor told the drums, xylophones, cymbals, bells and gongs to play their section twice.
There will be re-percussions.

Science gives me a hadron...

2: I have a pen that can write underwater..

..it can write other words as well.

1: For every four Koi fish, there is at least one impostor..

Observing the Koi, you can see that there are the A Koi, B Koi, C Koi and the D Koi.

4: I don't want to be offensive, but there is a very fine line between...

... numerator and denominator.

It's a divisive issue.

3: There was a Roman emperor who never aged after he turned 19.

His name was Constant Teen.

2: A Möbius strip walks into a bar, sobbing.
Bartender: "What's wrong buddy?"
Strip: "Where do l even begin?"

1: Hi.
I'm.
William.
Shatner's.
Speechwriter.

4: I fixed my brass instrument with a tuba glue.

3: I tried to fix my string instruments, but violins never solved anything.

This gag runs to over 2,200 characters, so I've uploaded it to my Dropshare (via Setapp subscription) repository.
Visit https://dsc.cloud/9d0c60/pb-UFdS94ym4g.txt to read.

2: Made a lovely candlelit dinner.

I think it would have cooked quicker in the oven though.

1: Stationery supplies turned up and they’ve given me cardboard instead of paper.

I’m writing them a stiff letter.

4: Dong. Ding Dong.
~ James Bond’s doorbell.

3: We do not check the refrigerator multiple times to see if different food has magically appeared.

We check the fridge multiple times to see if our standards have lowered to the point where we’ll eat what’s there.

2: There's a joke about an NDA but I am not allowed to tell it..

1: Due to inflation a picture now paints eleven hundred words.

4: My neighbour lost a quarter of their roof in the storm last night.
Oof.

3: Me: Where can I find some bricks, tiles, cement, and grout.

Hardware store clerk: They're under Construction in aisle 27.

Me: Do you know when they'll be finished?

2: Yes. I did go to anger management class.
No. I didn't pass.

1: Doctor: Do you smoke or drink alcohol?
Me: I drink it.

4: I never make the same mistake twice.
I do it like, five or six times, you know, to make sure.

3: I bought a waffle iron the other day.
I hate wrinkles in my waffles.

4: I was asked to put relish on the shopping list.
Now I can't read it.

3: I hate going to MC Hammer's house.
He won't let you touch anything.

2: If I'm being subjective, I'd say my favourite band is The Who.
If I was being objective, I'd say it was The Whom.

1: I am joining a secret society of electrical engineers and they just asked me to step into a large coil with a battery attached.
This is their current induction process.