4: Don't drink and drive
because there are people out there who text and drive...and they will hit you and it will be your fault...

3: Imagine how excited barn owls were when humans invented barns.

Nice, simple breakfast with quality ingredients. Two rashers of cold smoked (uncooked) streaky bacon cooked at medium heat in a little veg oil, turned frequently until the fat is translucent. This is NOT crispy bacon, instead it's properly cooked.
Plus two 58 gram eggs (sold as 700 g per dozen) well beaten and scrambled into the cooking oil left over from the bacon cooking.
No rubbery offering here, this method produces soft creamy curds of eggy goodness.

Evolution...

Thankfully that’s all over now. After a minor traffic incident in mid January I have had to attend the Magistrates Court in late June. No conviction recorded, required to make a small donation to a charity and am on a 6-month good behaviour bond. More importantly, I had until Sept 5 to take a medical review driving assessment in a VicRoads car for up to one hour. That was done today, I passed and get to retain my full licence.

2: I ate at Mary Poppins Restaurant last night. Super Cauliflower cheese but Lobster was atrocious.

1: In the capital of Ethiopia there is a famous nightclub sponsored by an equally famous sports brand that plays only music from Sweden's most popular band.
It's Addis Ababa's Adidas Abba bar.

4: The first person to ever hear a parrot talk was probably not okay for several days.

3: A wise man to his son: "My boy! When you accumulate the understanding to know why a pizza is made round, to be put in a square box and is eaten in triangles, then my son, you will be able to understand women."

More chores to be done today but it’s after 11pm and rubbish disposal, laundry washing, washing of dishes and sweeping floors associated with my disabilities means I’m in rather more pain than is customary. I ache in too many places.

2: A good woman is by your side during bad times to tell you that none of this would've happened If you had just listened to her...

1: At the police station:

"I'm not saying a word without my lawyer present."

"But YOU'RE the lawyer."

"Exactly, so where's my present?"

4: I paid a man to make a bed, he did a bunk... It's one thing on top of another.

3: Whoever came up with “a penny for your thoughts”, “don’t nickel and dime me”, and “another day another dollar”
sure knew how to coin a phrase.

2: If earth’s rotation doesn’t make your day then you don’t have a place in my world.

1: Waiter: How is your food sir?

Diner: My fish is very dry.

Waiter: Yes, we had to take him out of the water.

4: Afraid of not getting what you ordered with online shopping?

Try online dating!

3: Where do bad rainbows go?
To prism. It's a light sentence, but it gives them time to reflect.

In which I upgrade my ZTV from 32-in HD to 50-inch 4k: https://peemee.10centuries.org/2024/07/28/rearranging-the-furniture

Grief is the price we pay for love.

I was watching The Bermuda Philharmonic Orchestra last night.
Half way through the concert the man playing the triangle disappeared.

The soft drink 7 Up got its name from its seven ingredients: Lemon juice, lime juice, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, and sugar.

Started my new job with Microsoft last week . Everything was going great until one morning until I tripped over a power cord.

I'm pretty sure I plugged it back in….

@Vanitas Moo.

It’s been almost six years since a brush with death, my GP told me if I’d delayed seeing him for a further six hours I’d most likely have died. I’d contracted pneumonia and sepsis had set in, causing complete kidney failure amongst other complications. Yet I made an apparently full recovery with one lasting problem. Most nights, if I do get any sleep, it takes a long time to nod off. Like now, it’s almost 2:30 am and I just cannot get to sleep.

Parking rules.

2: The Crocheters Society is a clothes knit community.

1: Some dogs can bark up to 350 times a day.

That’s just a ruff estimate though…