Gary Poole
Managing editor of The Chattanooga Pulse website, best-selling SF/F editor, traffic reporter, sometime musician, kitten wrangler, lover of tropical shirts.
Joined Nov 2022
Just had a telemarketer call the request line to tell me I'd won an "all expenses paid" vacation.
He got a bit disturbed when I asked him if that included bail...
In honor of National Pickle Day, what is your favorite type of pickle?
Doc: "How many cups of coffee do you drink a day?"
Me: "Cups?"
Doc: ...
Me: "Um, how many cups are in a pot?"
Doc: "About seven."
Me: (trying to count in my head) "I hate math..."
Not sure why my coffee selfie was "hidden".
Weird.
It’s a coffee emergency! How am I supposed to do my morning show without any coffee???
Oh wait… I’ve just been informed that I can make some new coffee. Crisis averted.
If I ever see someone running with scissors, I’m not going to tell them to stop. Nope, I’m going to follow them to see what is so important that it needs to be cut RIGHT NOW!
Tables are made so we don’t eat on the floor.
Tablecloths were made so we don’t eat on the table.
Place mats were made so we don’t eat off of the tablecloth.
Plates were made so we don’t eat off the place mats.
Wings were made so we didn't need any of the above things.
I still worry that the cootie shot I got in the third grade was a placebo and not the actual vaccine.
Look, I’ll be cheerful once the caffeine kicks in. Before that… no promises made, no promises delivered.
And of course the greatest superhero in the history of superheroes: Super Grover!
Today is the 54th birthday for Sesame Street. I was (*cough*) two years old (*cough*) when it debuted and watched it all through my early childhood. It truly is an amazing success story on using television for education. Though I'm still annoyed that Grover was all but supplanted by that annoying upstart Elmo.
Following up on yesterday's post about pot pie and Thanksgiving, my wife has now decided she wants a seafood pot pie with mussels, shrimp, and lobster (along with a bechamel sauce and asparagus).
But here's the sticking point: we can't figure out what type of potatoes to include. So... who here is a spud expert and can help me out?
Another sign that I'm not as young as I used to be: I can remember a time when people went through an entire day without taking a photo of anything.
Let’s all raise a mug in celebration of making it through another week.
#Good morning
#CaffeineClub.
My life has a superb cast with tons of fascinating stories.
I just can't figure out the plot.
Sometimes I wonder if that little kid ever got a hippopotamus for Christmas.
So the wife casually mentions last night that instead of a traditional Thanksgiving dinner, maybe this year we could make a turkey pot pie and by "we" she means "me".
So now I have to learn how to make a decent pot pie from scratch. Because buying a frozen one isn't going to meet spousal approval.
How people think I get dressed in the morning: "Do I wear the short with the palm trees, the one with beer bottles, or the one with dragons on it?"
How I really get dressed in the morning: "(reaches blindly into the closet without turning on any lights and grabbing the first shirt I can grab)"
The good part of that is whenever someone asks sarcastically if I got dressed in the dark, I can honestly answer yes.
Gary Poole
Managing editor of The Chattanooga Pulse website, best-selling SF/F editor, traffic reporter, sometime musician, kitten wrangler, lover of tropical shirts.
Joined Nov 2022