There are VERY few people I genuinely like and even less that I truly love but the people that I have in my life, that I do love and do like have been there for 30+ years and we are family. I don't care about quantity, I care about quality.

Likes and follows have devalued the idea of really understanding who people are and "knowing" them before you "like" them. It's replaced needing to assess and understand the energy you invite into your life and made people into items on a fast food menu.

9/

I have been told that I make quick judgements and I do. For MYSELF.

I think if more people thought about what they were inviting into their lives with more honesty, they wouldn't make half as many mistakes or get hurt as much.

People have off days. I do but you'll most likely never know because I don't take my off days out on others. That's not what people are for. They aren't there to be punching bags or to be receptacles for your negative runoff.

That's not what friends are for either.

8/

If I meet someone, online or off, and they exhaust me in some way I stop right there. I trust that feeling that I experience. That feeling of energy drain is very telling.

It's usually not me, it's them and that tells me there is a lot going on with them that they don't have control over or aren't aware of.

I can spot a dysregulated person from miles away and such people are dangerous to themselves and others.

Misery loves company but I don't love Misery back. Misery can fuck right off.

7/

People get tired of me and I've had people in my life tell me "I'm tired of how you talk, I'm tired of how you make me feel" but when I've asked what exactly they are tired of or why it took them so long to figure that out they never have an answer they are willing to give that is honest.

To "get tired" of someone means you have resented them for a long time. It means you never truly knew them or liked them and you just were putting up with them until it exhausted you.

Why are you waiting?

6/

Can people change? Sure. But it doesn't happen overnight unless they had a TBI (which I have seen happen and it's scary AF). There is no "all of the sudden" when it comes to people's behavior.

There is only the stuff you chose not to see or decided to overlook because it was better for you at the moment because you didn't want to give that person up because you were lonely or bored or feeling fickle or because you just want to increase the random info on your feed.

It's rarely "real".

5/

I think if you like someone up until a moment that they surprise you with some kind of unexpected behavior ... then you didn't know them well enough to say you like them.

I think "like" is something that people give away like skittles to anyone who makes them feel something that benefits them ... but it's not a real, solid, or truly honest emotion that is based on who that person is ... only how that person makes YOU feel.

It's more selfish and therefore very temporary.

4/

Social media makes it easy to spot people who are "fair weather followers" and I can usually tell those people who follow me after one post that riles them up in a positive way or makes them think I'm "interesting" but they haven't really done their research and they unfollow me a day or two later.

I think people choose the people in their lives similarly ... without as much research and thought and understanding as they probably should. They base things on momentary feelings only ...

3/

He likes to point out the loud trash that takes itself out with the "I'm unfollowing you" statements and it's usually the same kind of statement every time. It's someone who says ... "I used to like your content but that last video ...." kind of stuff. I have heard versions of this same thing since I was in middle school. The "I used to like you until you said/did/made me feel that one thing ..." People only "like" you temporarily. They like you when it's convenient and gives them something.

2/

#FirstCoffeeThoughts

Harvard professor Sunn m'Cheaux is someone I follow on multiple platforms and whom I have shared here before. His brand of commentary makes sensitive, dysregulated, dishonest, and delusional people angry.

He tends to break through people's flimsy walls often, allowing the truth of who they are to come spilling out. It's never surprising when people reveal who they truly are, it's inevitable because walking around with a mask on 24/7/365 like many do is exhausting.

1/

Some people do exist in the world to take from others. Energy vampires or whatever you call them ... these people just want someone to walk through misery with them and they take whatever energy they can get from whomever will take that journey with them. They thrive in negativity and actively sabotage any opportunity for positive experiences to change their worldview. It's a deliberate way of living and sucking the life out of everyone around them.

Don't be that person.

She's one of those people that only wants someone to agree with her that life is awful or that life is terrible. She only wants you to stay in negativity with her. If you offer anything she gets mad or feels judged. If you try to make suggestions she has all the reasons in the world why those things won't work. If you offer any kind of advice she thinks you're a "know it all" ... These kinds of people are just so tedious and exhausting to deal with. They take energy from you.

She works a lot and hates her job. She also hates people and everyone she works with. She judges everyone and always has complaints about people around her. People are boring. Life is boring. Her health is bad. etc etc and on and on but never any ideas about making a change or trying to explore different things. She has no hobbies. She doesn't read books. She doesn't like music. She doesn't enjoy anything at all. She doesn't like putting effort into things. What kind of a life is that?

I am always unsure of how to respond to such people. I don't know how to talk to them or advise them because they don't want advice, they just want to complain or vent or yell and then go back to their misery. They want to drag someone else down with them and get mad when you don't respond in kind to their negativity. I don't have patience for that stuff. I'm a goaler. I'm a doer. I'm someone who doesn't believe in complaining and never taking any steps to fix anything or even trying to.

2/

I have an acquaintance that calls me often because she is bored or feeling restless. She's a very miserable person and I have a difficult time handling people who are perpetually depressed and won't do anything to examine that state. She is also a very angry person as a result of being depressed which also makes her difficult to handle. She is the type of person to complain about everything - work, people, the world, her health, her life - but will never do anything to change things.

1/

#ParkShinHye's amazing #TheJudgeFromHell series wrapped up its run as the most-watched miniseries of the entire week!

On November 2, the fantasy drama ended its run at the top of its time slot.

According to Nielsen Korea, the series finale of “The Judge from Hell” scored an average nationwide rating of 11.9 percent, taking first place in its time slot across all channels—and making it the most-watched miniseries to air this week.

If you haven't seen it ... DO ❤️

If you have time to make everyone else's life and interests the target of your vitriol then you're simply not busy enough or fulfilled enough in your own life.

Get a hobby. Get a job. Get therapy. Get refocused on what life really should be about ... and I will give you a hint: it shouldn't be about making other people, especially strangers, miserable.

If you really believe that your role in life is to judge, control, or try to destroy the lives of others ... you might be a trash person.

People have different likes, needs, preferences, needs, health concerns, financial needs, family situations, mental health levels, interests, desires, professions, accents, tastes, intelligence, wants, turn ons, turn offs, life paths, hairstyles, head shapes, body shapes, education levels, social access, and psychological profiles THAN YOU .... did you know that?

Did you also know that none of it needs to be your business and that you don't need to comment negatively or at all on ANY OF IT?

I hate to break it to you but ... OTHER PEOPLE EXIST IN THE SAME WORLD YOU EXIST IN.

It may come as a shock to you but try and take a breath and really understand what this means ...

It means YOU are NOT the CENTER of the universe and that YOU are NOT the ONLY person who exists in the world.

I know it's hard to understand, but do your best.

I imagine it's hard to accept reality when you're delusional, neurotic, and a sociopath but ... at least pretend to try.

Just because you decided to wake up today does not automatically give you the right to demand that everything should be about you.

Just because someone wrote a book or a video game or a television show that features someone of a culture, sex, age group, or ethnicity that is different from you doesn't mean anything is being take from you or that the world is somehow going to hell.

If you think this ... you seriously need a mental wellness check and/or therapy.

I'm tired of the STRUGGLE OLYMPICS, the OPPRESSION OLYMPICS, the MISERY RELAYS, the #CHRONICILLNESS gatekeeping and every single other thing people use to try and ensure that everyone is always in competition with one another instead of actually just LISTENING, UNDERSTANDING, and SUPPORTING each other.

This country brainwashes everyone into believing every single thing is a competition ... it's not.

Life is life and everyone has different struggles. It's not about who is "winning".