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Kept off social media for much of .

I hope that whatever you did was something you wanted to do, was relaxing, and fun.

I took barely any photos, I relaxed, and I didn't spend it with any family I didn't want to.

I am at my parents' house. My older sister is here. My is through the roof. I don't want to be here.

Saving grace is that the kiddos are at home with my partner making Santa cookies. Only one of us has to be here and it's neither of them

I'm currently doing some family admin, which involves submitting invoices for the & reading emails from service providers. The have decided to start charging more than the max funded amount, so an out-of-pocket expense for us. It's like , and not a fully funded system as I thought.

Can we wear the extra payment financially and continue kiddo's weekly sessions or cut back/cut out these sessions all together. How do I manage this to his maximum benefit?

QUT researchers have found climate change deniers predominantly have right-wing political views, are more likely to be older and relatively less educated.

qut.edu.au/news

If you live in Melbourne you have to get your coffee beans from Cisco Coffee on Chapel. I’ve tried them all and they win hands down. FREE same day delivery!! ciscoscoffee.com.au/

Speaking of , the official diagnoses was made of GAD and SAD for our kiddo. πŸ˜₯ I am hopeful that in the new year, now that it's official, we can make headway on learning how to alleviate it for him.

My partner and our daughter are checking out the Christmas lights around town before bed. kiddo and I are curled up in bed because of irrational fear.

It's that irrational fear I hate and it hurts knowing that it has its grips on my son. And I'm sad because we miss out. I miss out. I feel guilty sometimes for feeling that but it's there.

But he's safe, and almost asleep and not because he's not in a situation that makes him so and that's what matters.

Snuggled up with kiddo. He's at peace tonight, he's not fighting the sleep for once.

I just don't know how to feel about it. He's my dad but he also sucks. He wasn't a great father, if he could have pretended he wasn't a dad, he would have. He spoke frequently of how much he hated mum and wanted a divorce but couldn't afford it (& seeing her not cope over his withering away makes me angry from that). But I don't think I should feel nothing.

My dad is not a nice person, and on top of that, he fell down the Q-hole and every conspiracy train there was.

He's dying, slowly. He's still walking and talking but he's skin and bone, not eating, sleeping a lot. All the things I saw happen with my grandfolks in the months leading up to their own deaths. He has pulmonary fibrosis and was given 2-5 years, that was 3 years ago. He's forsaken treatments (evil pharma) and stopped seeing doctors earlier this year after a blood cancer scare.

g'day cOsO!

hope your thursday is going well.

i wish you life. i wish you prosperity. i wish you health.

ps. be kind πŸ’œ it matters

Off to my first physio-ordered hydrotherapy appointment for my knee. I am not a morning person (and almost 7 years of having kids hasn't managed to change that). Unfortunately the tiredness isn't diminishing the one feels at being in a swimsuit.

I did it! Today was meeting today and I've been leading on the logistics and it was nice to have the day go so well. Hope they enjoy their fancy dinner.

Sitting with kiddo. We've neglected to get more melatonin tablets and the chews don't work as well on their own. 🀦 Being present is a double edged sword. He needs one of us with him to settle, but our presence also invites him to fight the sleep. I've got soothing sleepy music on and a hand patting his leg and I'll be here for however long he needs.

It's been a hot minute since I've posted anything. I've been overwhelmed and stressed in every aspect of life, feeling like a failure across the spectrum.

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gabzi3la πŸ‡¦πŸ‡ΊπŸ¦•

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