Thanks to a conversation with @amarand and @JLong i have updated my updated resume and tailored it to 3 specific job types. I have sent out a grip of applications with it so fingers crossed I got it right this time.

@amarand @JLong also had another resume review and I'm trying my best to make these edits. I can't think of any accomplishments and I don't know how to change the language to be more of an accomplisher than a doer.

I am a doer. I accomplish ninja shit by doing ninja shit.

@dr_zooks @amarand @JLong Accomplishments are the things that you are done doing and you already did.

Stuff like "re-engineered x to do y" or "maintained complex blah that did blah".

Sometimes you might euphemize a little. Don't say "drove shitty middle manager to quit" say "helped refine team dynamic."

@AskTheDevil @amarand @JLong "I will throat punch your kids if you don't hire me right fuckin now." and then attach a picture of Steve Martin from the airport scene in Planes, Trains and Automobiles.

Like that?

@dr_zooks @amarand @JLong You could probably refine that a little.

@AskTheDevil @amarand @JLong your kids have nice throats, sure would be a shame if someone were to ram a fist into them...