and finally, we finish on the hilarious irony of "join us for this meeting on the lack of childcare. no on-site childcare will be provided."

no, what encourages car use among Texans is THE SIZE OF TEXAS. the Dallas metroplex alone is over 9000 [Vegeta gif] square miles. do you know how fucking annoying it is to visit my cousin in her "luxury" apartment and having to park 3 blocks away at a public park because they're all "we don't need parking, we don't need to drive, we wfh and there's a restaurant across the street!" I'm not living anywhere that doesn't have someplace for me to park my fucking car.

I was today years old when I realized this Simpsons episode was referencing a real-life Barbara Walters interview.

or we could, idk, NOT MAKE GUNS SO EASILY ACCESSIBLE

beyond parody

you could build a perpetual energy machine fueled by this guy furiously masturbating over Covid-era school closures.

Right-wing media 101: "both sides have taken up the antitrust cause. Democrats are taking action against monopolies. Some Republicans are worried about it."

REAGANOMICS. THE FREE MARKET IS A LIE.

see? that wasn't so hard. capitalism naturally encourages the consolidation of economic power. this is going to happen EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. you can't rely on competition unless you have a permanent, non-profit, govt-regulated alternative at every turn. ISPs, utilities, healthcare, groceries, housing, etc. the free market is a goddamn lie, it can't save you from the monopolies inherent in the system.

if I had a nickel for every time some right-wing capitalist simp referred to autocracies as "communist" I could buy Xitter from Elmo Muskrat. North Korea is not communist, you can tell because KJU OWNS PROPERTY and the country's wealth is not being equally distributed amongst the people. Venezuela used to function great as a socialist country, until Maduro took over and fucked it all up and started hoarding wealth for himself. enough comparing capitalism to strawman examples of "communism."

the problem is, we don't actually have a free market, in any industry. literally, tell me the last time you heard of ANY business lowering their prices to gain or retain customers. I'll wait. 💀

ok I am CERTAIN I've seen this blurb in the Morning newsletter before, in fact I'm certain I've had this exact reaction to this blurb in the Morning newsletter, wtf is going on?!

idk what they mean by "treating people like commodities," all I know is if it wasn't for online dating I wouldn't be married and I probably wouldn't even be alive right now (nor would my two kids)

didn't they just elect AMLO? how often does Mexico hold presidential elections?

wow, somehow both responses managed to get it wrong. user data privacy isn't nearly as big of a concern as the reality of Chinese influence over Americans using the app. (as an aside, users complaining about the ban just speaks to how worryingly addicted they are.) if this was a Russian or Saudi-owned app being used to influence US opinion/elections, I doubt we'd even hesitate to ban it.

and continuing to portray Trump's openly fascist rhetoric as "dark" minimizes the grave threat he poses to our future. DO BETTER, MEDIA. CALL A SPADE A FUCKING SPADE ALREADY.

why? just because someone claims they're being censored doesn't mean they're right, nor is there anything wrong with certain forms of "censorship." am I being "censored" because I can't yell FIRE in a crowded theater? it's not even the govt censoring these people, it's private entities upholding their civic responsibility to truth in election information.

my condolences to anyone who was a fan of these books