At the peak of my delusional #eatingdisorder / body destruction in 2012, I took a fully nude picture and posted it on G+ (@divisionbyzero I'm sure remembers 🤣) Where I showcased everything wrong with my body and to chart my #healthtracking goals for hitting my ideal weight.
I had a blog where I meticulously documented my 4 1/2 hours of DAILY workouts, my starvation diet, every morsel of food I ate once a week, and all my struggles to figure things out with no doctor and no insurance.
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This was when I knew nothing about how my body actually worked, didn't understand how #PCOS, #Hashimotos, thyroid issues, #cortisol response, #InsulinResistance, fat storage in response to obsessive cardio and not eating, extra #testosterone, as well as all the other the hormones my body put out to deal with #chronicpain, actually affected my weight and overall body. I was always under the impression, and made to feel by EVERYONE including previous doctors, that I was lazy and ate too much.
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But as I learned over the course of 12 years ... NONE of my problems actually had anything to do with FOOD or how much I did or didn't EXERCISE. And that starving myself and over exercising RUINED my body more and caused my metabolism to crash and burn.
I know now - thanks to 12+ years of obsessive data collection, correlations, my own self-education, and finally doctors who listen and READ said data - that ALL of my problems were hereditary issues ... unfixable by me or anything I tried.
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And then lots of kids would ride their bikes behind the DDT-spraying trucks for fun. While they were spraying.