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TRENDLINES

Morning,

Ken-Dogger: Hey Roscoe, some baseball last night huh?
Roscoe: Eh, I was struck by something different.
KD: Okay, I’m waiting…what?
R: Well, they were talking about low batting averages, and then the dude said, we’re 16 games in…To a 162-game season.
KD: Yes, about a 10th in…
R: And peeps are already screaming about teams or players underwhelming.
KD: Peeps always look for trends
R: Peeps need to extend their trendlines…We’re making mountains out of molehills.

After the 2019 Sri Lanka Bombing...

Ken-Dogger: Hey Sal, you're looking a little freaked this morning.
Sal: Well KD, yesterday was a scary day..
KD: Oh, you mean with all the bombings in Sri Lanka?
S: Yes Dude, just sad how much people seek to destroy...
KD: Well, when you have leaders stoking fears and falsehoods, you're gonna get destruction...
S: And further away from a path forward.
KD: Right you are Sal, right you are...

PAYBACKS

Ken-Dogger: Hey Fernando...oops, didn't realize you were still sleepin'....
Fernando: What Dude, I'm up now...
KD: Buddy, just wanted to tell you, it's raining outside now, can't take you out...
F: KD, not cool dude, not cool...
KD: Sometimes my exuberance gets the better of me...
F: I'm steppin' in places he won't want me to later...

BONDING

Ken-Dogger: Morning Shady, what up?
Shady: Dude, don’t you remember, it’s 4/20/2020…It’s magical.
KD: Oh, you mean this 420 number is magical for stoners…
S: Yep, where are the Waldos, those kids from San Rafael who met at 4:20 under the Louis Pasteur statue.
KD: Wow, important to have stuff to bond over, don’t you think?
S: It is Bro, life is about finding bonds isn’t it?
KD: So I’m told bro, so I’m told.

HOW US JUSTICE WORKS

Ken-Dogger: Hey Bernie, what you lookin' for?
Bernie: Dude, the redacted Mueller Report...
KD: Don't think you'll find it there, it's getting released today, and I don't think you'll see that much print.
B: You mean, there's gonna be a lot of cross outs
KD: Apparently, in Today's America, you get to choose which crimes get exposed...
B: Wow, that happens for everyone?
KD: No, just the rich and powerful few...it's what we call an Oligarchic Democracy

STILL IN SEARCH OF...

Ken-Dogger: Morning Chewy, you all hunkered down this morning?
Chewy: Yep, too many arrows slinging…
KD: Meaning?
C: Peeps screaming on the right, peeps screaming on the left…It’s nasty
KD: Crises bring out the best and the worst in peeps.
C: So I’m going to hunker for a while.
KD: You may have that luxury, our Leaders don’t…We need careful, controlled action now.
C: Careful, controlled action? I’m gonna be hunkered down for a while aren’t I?
KD: Yep

Morning Peeps,

Ken-Dogger: Hey Clyde what’s your glide?
Clyde: I was just thinking about the women in Afghanistan.
KD: Oh, you mean Biden’s pullout and the effect?
C: Yep, gains of the last 20 years may be lost. So sad…
KD: What is sad is the subjugation, the ‘lording’ of one person over another.
C: What is so threatening about women?
KD: I’m not sure it’s the women, I think it’s more the fleeting stability of power.
C: Does seem like Power crushes…
KD: If you let it…

OVER TWO YEARS NOW...

Morning Integrators,

Ken-Dogger: Morning Clyde, what’s up with the world?
Clyde: Dude, more purging…Putin seems to have less peeps around him.
KD: They are just reporting battle results.
C: Well, it seems bad news doesn’t bode well in dictatorships.
KD: You know, it doesn’t bode well in democracies either.
C: It’s just crazy how one man can destroy a country’s standing in the world.
KD: Yes, isn’t it.

Ken-Dogger: Hey Georgi, what’s going on?
Georgi: Watching you do your breathing check dude.
KD: Hey, when the Health Professionals talk, I listen.
G: So how’d it go?
KD: Deep breathing checked, all systems a GO…
G: Good, hopefully you’re checking the RIGHT systems.
KD: Georgi, me too, but I think we’re going to find new systems.
G: New systems, new challenges…Sounds like a Dog’s Life…
KD: It’s the Life we’re living.

ORDERING CONFUSION

Morning Peeps,

Ken-Dogger: What tha...
Scruffy: Dude, don't ask, the Mrs. got it for me...
KD: Damn Scruffy, what's up with the hood?
S: I thought something was fishy when the Mrs. ordered from the Kinder Kennel Koats (KKKDOGS.COM) website.
KD: Wasn't there a pic?
S: There was, it just didn't capture the whole Imperial Knights vibe.
KD: Scruffy, that's their shtick...They don't appear who they are.

A Timeless Question...SIZE

Ken-Dogger: Okay Moose, watch me again...
Moose: What am I watching for again?
KD: I'm walkin', I'm showing you the steps you take...
M: Dude, we've got a framing issue...
KD: Framing?
M: Yea Dude, how is a little guy gonna teach a big fella like me how to walk?
KD: You CAN learn a lot from following others.
M: Let me know when you get the life-size replicas for training,

IN AN EMERGENCY, YOU JUST DO...

Ken-Dogger: Hey Cooper, why the sad face?
Cooper: I see the leash out, means more training
KD: Training is good for the soul
C: Dude, listen, I get the whole master-serf thing, but the repetition…
KD: We’re massing practice so you know what to do.
C: Oh, like the stay command, how ‘bout you teach this to humans.
KD: We didn’t have time before Stay orders were given.
C: In an emergency, you don’t have time, you just DO.

SEEING WHAT WORKS

Ken-Dogger: Morning Salt N Pepa, how goes it?
Salt N Pepa: Dude, it’s a Stormy Monday.
KD: Yes, and Tuesday’s gonna be just as bad, and The Eagle may not fly on Friday.
SNP: Lord have mercy, Lord have mercy on me.
KD: Wha…You’re a Blues Singer now?
SNP: Dude, this weather, this pandemic, we’re all tryin’ on new roles.
KD: Yes, we are, and finding a role that works.
SNP: Yes, I’m tryin’ to find some peace to keep it home with me.

Morning,

Ken-Dogger: Hey Dinky, what ‘cha doing?
Dinky: Looking for Answers…
KD: I see you have books open, what are you seeking?
D: Trying to see if Peeps can learn.
KD: Well, of course they can, how would we progress if we didn’t learn?
D: Are we progressing?
KD: I see your point…We need to keep setting conditions.
D: We’ve set conditions, Peeps aren’t living to expectations.
KD: It’s a long, long road with many a winding turn…
D: And it seems to be leading us nowhere.

YOU GOTTA COME TO THE PLATE & BAT

Ken-Dogger: Hey Satchel, I see you got a baseball...
Satchel: Yep, it's the season, I know how much you love it
KD: I do Boy, it's the strategy, it's the never say never, it's the excitement of knowing you might be down, but never out...
S: Wow, interesting, are all games like that?
KD: Not all, but baseball teaches life...most team sports do
S: Dude, glad I'm on your team...
KD: I am too Boy, let's do this thing called life
S: Okay, batter up...

YOU ASK ME HOW HE KNOWS HE KNOWS

Ken-Dogger: I know Tito, creeps me out too.
Tito: Why, just why?
KD: Come on, humor the Mrs., She wanted you to enjoy today.
T: But creeping me out with this…This is Easter?
KD: No, this is commercialized Easter. All we got since we can’t come together and worship.
T: So what.
KD: Well, peeps might ask how you think God knows our devotion if we don’t come together
T: He knows, he knows it’s within our hearts.

IN SEARCH OF CLOSER MISSES

Morning Close Missers,

Ken-Dogger: Hey Duffer, you look tired?
Duffer: KD, this driving is taxing.
KD: IKR, and I’m out here trying to hit a hole.
D: It looks easy on TV, why are you struggling?
KD: Well, those Pros on TV don’t show you their struggles.
D: They miss putts just like you do consistently.
KD: Steady…But their misses are closer.
D: So that’s what practice does, gives us closer misses.
KD: Sometimes Duffer, that’s all you get.

DOING THE SAFETY DANCE

Ken-Dogger: Morning Brucie and Juicy Lucy, what’s up Brucie?
Brucie: I’m laying something on Juicy here…
KD: Already this morning?
B: Dude, get your mind out of the gutter, I was talking about safety
KD: Oh, do tell
B: I was reminding her about where it’s safe to place her tongue…
Lucy: Yea, so butt out…We’re doing the safety dance
B: Trouble is until you can guarantee more are safe, we aren’t traveling far.
KD: Neither am I Brucie, neither am I.

STANDING TALL, FOR SELF AND OTHERS

Ken-Dogger: Hey there Cato, what are you doing?
Cato: Standing tall Dude…
KD: Yes, but why?
C: I see you standing at the crossroads Bro, not knowing which path to follow.
KD: I know which path, it’s the one which methodically gets us through.
C: So now you know why I’m standing, I’ll stand by you.
KD: And I’ll stand by you, won’t let nobody hurt you.
C: That’s the spirit, even in our darkest hour, Standing Tall…

Ken-Dogger: Morning Kit, it was bound to happen.
Kit: I knew it when that sewing machine came out, what are you getting?
KD: Mikster is making me CV protection.
K: Am I to assume that’s what this is?
KD: Not exactly, she’s following a pattern for my stuff
K: I like it when peeps follow patterns, it gives predictability.
KD: True Kit, and it reminds us of order in our world.
K: We need order, now most particularly
KD: Another reason to bring back Home Ec, bringing order to chaos.

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TROUBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE

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