I will be thoroughly disappointed if the first human born on Mars isn't named Marvin.

Instead of getting up at my usual 4:30am, I slept in this morning ... all the way to 5am! Woo hoo! I feel so refreshed!

Okay, maybe I need to go with a slightly less caffeinated coffee...

#GoodMorning
#CaffeineClub

One does not make friends with salad.

This is how you make friends.

‘Nuff said.

https://youtu.be/xy4FXhkm6Nw

Just saw a cop pull over a U-Haul truck. I think he is trying to bust a move.

Cat logic: if there’s a sunbeam, I must sit in it.

#catsofcoso

Debating whether or not to put on pants today...

Peep flavors are just getting out of hand.

I'll take pie any day. I love pie.

Question of the Day: Cake or Pie?

#QuestionOfTheDay

I’ve been giving this a lot of thought lately, and I’ve finally decided that I want to be buried in a spring-loaded casket filled with confetti, just so a future archaeologist can have a truly awesome day at work.

TIL it's a lot easier to focus on traffic reporting when I am not also hosting a morning show.

Though I do miss my morning show.

The morning traffic reporter in his natural environment…with the caffeinated elixir of life in hand. ☕

#GoodMorning
#CaffeineClub

I remember when I left home to attend college my mother said, “Don’t forget to write.” And I thought, “Well, that’s unlikely. It’s a pretty basic skill, isn’t it?”

Fun fact: Lance may be an uncommon name nowadays, but back in medieval times, people were called Lance a lot.

I would pick Brad Pitt, even though I look more like Weird Al. 😁

Today's random question: Who would you want to play you in a movie of your life?

#QuestionOfTheDay

I'm beginning to think that I buy bananas just to watch them die a slow death in my kitchen. I guess I'm a banana serial killer.

Welcome to Monday. Let’s carpe that diem!

#GoodMorning
#CaffeineClub

You just don’t see enough people being taken away in straight jackets anymore. Just saying...