Death doula Alua Arthur says life is better if you 'get real' about the end

https://www.npr.org/2024/04/17/1245264129/death-doula-alua-arthur-briefly-perfectly-human

I think one of the great failures of Western Society is the apparent taboo about talking or thinking of death. We pretend that the next pill or potion will help us live forever, fueling our consumer society.

I feel that death is a passage as birth is a passage, and that we should acknowledge and plan for it. Life and death are intimately intertwined and one cannot exist without the other.

@gemswinc when I worked in dialysis, as a social worker, I had discussions about end of life care with my patients. Some didn't want to discuss it at all, while others welcomed the opportunity to talk about what they wanted and didn't want and to implement their wishes in writing. The ones who refused to discuss it, I always followed up, because sometimes planting the seeds helped to open the door for further discussions.

@Spagesgallo1 Ah, you have been on the front lines, I'm glad you follow up w/ those who might discuss it. My husband, nevertheless, refused.

@gemswinc I'm sorry that your husband refused to talk about it. For some, it is just way too uncomfortable for them to discuss. Fear is also a big factor for people avoiding the topic. Even healthcare workers struggle with it. I have also worked with a doctor who was anti end of life care. People on dialysis, vents and in a vegetative state. He believed in keeping them alive at any cost! 🤦‍♀️

@Spagesgallo1 @gemswinc
So sad to hear! Because you know he passed that one to patients. I am for euthanasia if people choose. There are definitely worse things than death.

@CinnamonGirlE @gemswinc
It was sad and infuriating! He was actually imposing his religious beliefs upon his patients and their families. He didn't care about quality of life! I am totally with you on euthanasia! Always have been. I always believed in death with dignity. I just feel so honored and privileged to have helped people on that journey. That's where I miss the work that I did!

@Spagesgallo1 @CinnamonGirlE A+ Euthanasia. If that was easily available, I would be much more sanguine about how things could end. If you know there is an escape route if needed, there would be less worry

@gemswinc @CinnamonGirlE

Oh, I feel you deeply on that as well! It would really help to make it so much easier to face the end if euthanasia were available as a treatment option. People can stop chemo or withdraw from dialysis...those are legal treatment options! It really would help if we had euthanasia as an option as well. There would be much less worry and we would feel more empowered! More control over an inevitable outcome. Thank goodness at least for hospice.