Eating fig rolls in bed because I'm an adult and I can do what I want in my own home!
@Kurtroedeger But I *like* it weird! Eleanor might not appreciate it so much, mind you 🤣
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Ą̷͇̀l̵̩̓̕l̸̩͘ ̸̭̪̈́ť̷̝̍̆h̶̡̛̰̯̏͌a̷͕̞͋̂t̵̩͙͑̈́͝'̵̛̍́ͅͅş̴̬̱͝ ̷̗̊͠l̵͚̕͠ē̸̻͓̐͝f̷̧͙̀̑͝t̶͓̓͊̚ ̶̜̱̓͌́a̴͉͊r̶̡̩͛̀é̵̦̞͕ ̶̮̾ṫ̷̡͈̍ḧ̸̛͍́̊e̴̫̅ş̶̥̰̓e̴̟̪͌͂̇ ̷̞̅͊̚h̷̰͕͈͂e̶̡̹̜̚ŗ̸̗͈̾̇e̴̩̍͐ ̷̪͉̩̀a̵̡̱̐͑͝s̴͎͖̈́h̸͈͌́͜e̴͕̝̐̌ś̶͓̆ͅ.̵̩̉ ̵̱͊͑̀
::Tosses hunter a pair of chaps and bunny ears::
@Kurtroedeger @_Hunter
*Pulls the celery out of the fridge and the balloon whisk from the drawer*
I don't have enough to go around, so Hunter, you need to bring your own cheez-whiz and harmonica
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Ą̷͇̀l̵̩̓̕l̸̩͘ ̸̭̪̈́ť̷̝̍̆h̶̡̛̰̯̏͌a̷͕̞͋̂t̵̩͙͑̈́͝'̵̛̍́ͅͅş̴̬̱͝ ̷̗̊͠l̵͚̕͠ē̸̻͓̐͝f̷̧͙̀̑͝t̶͓̓͊̚ ̶̜̱̓͌́a̴͉͊r̶̡̩͛̀é̵̦̞͕ ̶̮̾ṫ̷̡͈̍ḧ̸̛͍́̊e̴̫̅ş̶̥̰̓e̴̟̪͌͂̇ ̷̞̅͊̚h̷̰͕͈͂e̶̡̹̜̚ŗ̸̗͈̾̇e̴̩̍͐ ̷̪͉̩̀a̵̡̱̐͑͝s̴͎͖̈́h̸͈͌́͜e̴͕̝̐̌ś̶͓̆ͅ.̵̩̉ ̵̱͊͑̀
OH DEAR. THIS POST WAS SET TO SELF-DETONATE 💣 💥 🔥
Ą̷͇̀l̵̩̓̕l̸̩͘ ̸̭̪̈́ť̷̝̍̆h̶̡̛̰̯̏͌a̷͕̞͋̂t̵̩͙͑̈́͝'̵̛̍́ͅͅş̴̬̱͝ ̷̗̊͠l̵͚̕͠ē̸̻͓̐͝f̷̧͙̀̑͝t̶͓̓͊̚ ̶̜̱̓͌́a̴͉͊r̶̡̩͛̀é̵̦̞͕ ̶̮̾ṫ̷̡͈̍ḧ̸̛͍́̊e̴̫̅ş̶̥̰̓e̴̟̪͌͂̇ ̷̞̅͊̚h̷̰͕͈͂e̶̡̹̜̚ŗ̸̗͈̾̇e̴̩̍͐ ̷̪͉̩̀a̵̡̱̐͑͝s̴͎͖̈́h̸͈͌́͜e̴͕̝̐̌ś̶͓̆ͅ.̵̩̉ ̵̱͊͑̀
I'll get to it. I just got distracted by stuyes big fig roll
@Kurtroedeger Wait til you see the Truffle Shuffle! @_Hunter
@Kurtroedeger @_Hunter
Are you sure?
It's very alluring!
Meh, I do that every morning just trying to get my socks on.
@Kurtroedeger See? It's sexy. That's why Mrs Kurt is still sticking around. #BlessKurtsWife @_Hunter
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Ą̷͇̀l̵̩̓̕l̸̩͘ ̸̭̪̈́ť̷̝̍̆h̶̡̛̰̯̏͌a̷͕̞͋̂t̵̩͙͑̈́͝'̵̛̍́ͅͅş̴̬̱͝ ̷̗̊͠l̵͚̕͠ē̸̻͓̐͝f̷̧͙̀̑͝t̶͓̓͊̚ ̶̜̱̓͌́a̴͉͊r̶̡̩͛̀é̵̦̞͕ ̶̮̾ṫ̷̡͈̍ḧ̸̛͍́̊e̴̫̅ş̶̥̰̓e̴̟̪͌͂̇ ̷̞̅͊̚h̷̰͕͈͂e̶̡̹̜̚ŗ̸̗͈̾̇e̴̩̍͐ ̷̪͉̩̀a̵̡̱̐͑͝s̴͎͖̈́h̸͈͌́͜e̴͕̝̐̌ś̶͓̆ͅ.̵̩̉ ̵̱͊͑̀
It's the nipple tassels that really make it pop. When you get them rotating opposite directions 
@Kurtroedeger @_Hunter
And all because of one small misunderstanding.
Kurt asked me to buy him a couple of pasties.
How was I to know he meant these?
@stueytheround @_Hunter to be fair, I'd wear those as a bra too.
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Ą̷͇̀l̵̩̓̕l̸̩͘ ̸̭̪̈́ť̷̝̍̆h̶̡̛̰̯̏͌a̷͕̞͋̂t̵̩͙͑̈́͝'̵̛̍́ͅͅş̴̬̱͝ ̷̗̊͠l̵͚̕͠ē̸̻͓̐͝f̷̧͙̀̑͝t̶͓̓͊̚ ̶̜̱̓͌́a̴͉͊r̶̡̩͛̀é̵̦̞͕ ̶̮̾ṫ̷̡͈̍ḧ̸̛͍́̊e̴̫̅ş̶̥̰̓e̴̟̪͌͂̇ ̷̞̅͊̚h̷̰͕͈͂e̶̡̹̜̚ŗ̸̗͈̾̇e̴̩̍͐ ̷̪͉̩̀a̵̡̱̐͑͝s̴͎͖̈́h̸͈͌́͜e̴͕̝̐̌ś̶͓̆ͅ.̵̩̉ ̵̱͊͑̀
But make sure you let them cook down. Last thing I need is second degree burns on my nipples again
@Kurtroedeger It's not a mistake I'll make twice. @_Hunter
@Fiikus_goddess @stueytheround @_Hunter
I haven't had one of those 🤔
Maybe I can do that this weekend so I can feel all fancy when I'm running errands.
Not sure if the local community can handle that level of sexy though.
@evistre I searched Cornish Pasty Bikini expecting to find *printed fabric* and lo and behold this was the first result!
@Fiikus_goddess @Kurtroedeger @_Hunter
@stueytheround @evistre @Kurtroedeger @_Hunter
The UK version of American Pie?
@stueytheround @evistre @Fiikus_goddess @Kurtroedeger all this tells me is that “the algorithm” is spot on
@evistre @stueytheround @Kurtroedeger @_Hunter
Grass skirt got competition.
Should we start a #burntNippleClub ?
@Kurtroedeger Not a club I'd encourage anyone to join 🔥
@_Hunter
It's better now that we banned candles at our ceremonies.
@Kurtroedeger Soak the harmonica in whiskey.
It won't clean it but it'll taste amazing when you suck out the cream.
@_Hunter
@stueytheround @_Hunter
Also, I still have some cannoli filling clogging up the harmonica 🤦♀️