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Stress Level = Considering emailing my stepmom about parenting advice

I am struggling having two college kids doing college from home. Do I keep them in the chore rota and expect them to be with the family? Do I pretend they aren't here? How do you run a household like this?

By college age I was running my life on my own. My roommates and I either had zero things we did together (freshman year) or we decided the workload split in advance (sophomore on). When I was home during semester breaks I worked and paid my mom's bills.
My kids aren't.

@LianaBrooks Mine will contribute to the chores until they're no longer living here. Harder question on the mandatory family time. Might be a "pick your battles" situation.

@kel We were doing well, but this week had a bunch of sudden changes, and midterms, and we didn't rescheduled work like we normally do.... which answers my question. Thanks. :)

We had a plan, we didn't use it, and everything fell apart. >.<

@kel Thank you!
I have no frame of reference for this since my parents gave up parenting by the time I was 12. This is all uncharted territory and I'm never sure if I'm doing this right.

@LianaBrooks I think we're all doing the best we can with what we were given LONG before our own kids were born.

My bar is pretty low too, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. I figure as long as they have it better than I did, then that's about as close to winning as gets.

@kel Truth. And I know I'm a better parent than my parents were.

@LianaBrooks Our college kiddos are exempt from the "formal" chores roster as long as they have a job when home, though they are still expected to help out when possible. But that's because they are expected to help defray the cost of their room & board during the school year.
If they are doing school from home full-time, that's a different situation. My advice would be to have a sit-down with them and discuss what ways they can contribute, and what would be most helpful to the family.

@Synical At this point all we're asking is for them to help with dishes and cooking sometimes. It's not much. This has just been a week of schedules colliding, panic over midterms, and changes at work. Everyone is frazzled.

@LianaBrooks Yikes! Hope things settle down - and when they do, you can look at them and ask how they liked the "Introduction to Adulting" seminar or the workshop on project management. 😉

@Synical Intro To Adulting is my least favorite class.

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