What's worse?
"Selfishly" taking care of yourself, at the accidental "expense" of others temporarily inconvenienced at the time without your knowledge?
Or hatred & overblown, irrational anger that lasts for days, weeks, months, or even years, & is exploded all over the "selfish" one for being SO selfish?
What if the angry people won't accept apologies & behave in ways they themselves should apologize for?
What if those people act as if their anger & hate is self righteous, instead of in fact rather selfish itself by subjecting lots of other people to those negative feelings, instead of letting it go?
Especially is those people consider themselves to be good Christians who aren't supposed to harbor such negativity within themselves at the expense of relationships with others, like family?
Who's the more selfish, really?
Those who need more time daily for self care, who have trouble sleeping & waking daily?
Or those who harbor hatred & anger towards such people in their family, at the expense of familial relations?
@Astartiel I’m sorry you’re enduring this. If it’s your family behaving this way, I’m sorry. NO ONE deserves to be treated this way - NO ONE. Every one of us deserves to be treated with respect and dignity. It almost makes it impossible to examine your part in the situation objectively because someone else is taking your moral inventory for you, robbing you of doing it yourself. I was raised this way, and I left those people 20 yrs ago. It was a necessity. I hope you escape this toxicity soon.
@nopuppet_007 Thank you. I would love to be able to escape it except I'm locked to them due to financial poverty.
What’s worse?
Having someone in your life that elicits these feelings? Rid yourself of the abusive person. I did. Even though family.
@LnzyHou I would love to be able to. Can't even avoid them right now.
You can stop talking/listening to them.
@LnzyHou Yeah, that's about it
@LnzyHou If I could, I would
It is never selfish to take care of yourself.
@JoyfullyDazed Unless you have my brother & SIL.
I'm sorry you have to deal with that. I hope things get better soon. 💕
@JoyfullyDazed That would be great
@Astartiel When people call me selfish, I own it. Because I am. I need a lot of alone time. It's how I'm wired. However, I'll be the first one to help or be there for someone when they need it. So it evens out.
@mistressticia I own it too, but have family that consider it the worst thing ever apparently & who like to virtue signal about how selfless they are. Ugh.
@Astartiel Ugh. Don't feel bad for taking care of yourself. You're important.🖤
What's worse?
Taking care of oneself in a way some see as being incredibly selfish (like being a night owl who's slow to get ready for the day or soaking in a bath for 2 hours in the wee hours of the morning).
Or feeling hatred & anger towards that person by yelling, screaming, & calling that person names in such a way that you make that person feel like they shouldn't exist?