Wait, if Zur can just beam his own giant floating head into Starfighter headquarters whenever he wants, why is he wasting time torturing spies? Why does it matter? Just go watch your estranged dad eat tapas or whatever

Galaxy Quest is set in this same universe, you can't change my mind

We got spaceships and repulsor guns and pewpew lasers, but what gets the job done is...a good old fashioned brick of C4.

Zur went to the Trump University School of Emperor-ing, I see

"Soon they will all bow before me" lol wut

Definitely not me singing the 1980s Lite Brite jingle to the glow of the trailer park sign

I mean, why would I even remember that jingle

Ah, the 80s. When all you needed to hitchhike was a bedroll and a discount Burt Reynolds stache.

Alex just looks vaguely depressed that Centauri shot an alien off the roof into his lap.

I also forgot that this movie's first act takes up nearly half its runtime

"The frontier could collapse at any moment" STOP MOURNING THE WEIRD OLD GUY YOU ONLY MET TWICE AND GET TO WORK, CANNON FODDER BOY

How does Beta repair his own head after removing his own head? His eyes are on that thing!

GET IN THE GUNSHIP, SHINJ- I MEAN ALEX

"Death is a primitive concept" but yeah, my dude, all the other Starfighters are dead

Alex over here acting like he just walked into this movie

Did Alex just call Grig an iguana? Fuck you, dude, I hope your girlfriend and Beta have hundreds of children.

"What's that?"
"The frontier."

That is the Romulan Neutral Zone, Grig my man, wtf u doin

I love 80s special effects so much

Grig just negging Alex up one side and down the other to get him to take Starfightering seriously, I can't even

Ah the 80s, when we all rode around in the back of open pickup trucks and we all turned out just fine (except the ones who are dead)

Alex honey, you have to point the picture side of the picture at Grig if you want him to see anything

Negging shall henceforth be known as Grigging, I don't make the rules

We needed a sequel where Lewis gets to do some cool shit.

We wouldn't have deserved it, but we needed it.

Beta gives away the whole Alex-duplicate shtick right in front of the alien assassin rent a cop, all because he can't find the clitoris.

There's a lesson in this

Zur needs to chew more scenery. I need him to go next door to the Howard the Duck set and chew their scenery too.

"Alex in space? Is this for real?"
"Yes, and that was almost the title of this movie!"

I cannot believe Zur fell for that. I guess movie villains really were dumber back in the day. Thanos would have at least checked for a body.

I have been invaded by the Last Purrfighter

I also forgot they named the special attack "Death Blossom." DB for short.

One thousand years dungeon

RAMMING SPEED

The bad guy drones scream like Portal turrets.

"We die."

ICONIC

PUSH HIM OFF THE BUILDING, MR. PRESIDENT

How is the roof of that diner holding the weight of that ship? How did Alex know it would? I have so many questions

Anyway, Alex is back in his flying penis extender and Maggie is all over that

Oh please, this is a rural American trailer park. Someone would have shot Alex on sight.

The experience of Alex returning and bringing Grig along singlehandedly turned this entire trailer park into Fox News viewers.

Would it be less noteworthy if the worlds Alex saved *didn't* include Earth?

"Why can't you just stay?" Maggie asks, standing in the dulcet glow of a Bud Light sign

Ya boy just saved the galaxy, you think he wants to drink piss water in a trailer park anymore? Even if you are hotter than average?

TRIUMPHANT MUSIIIIIC

SMOOCHIIIIING

They'll break up in a week