How people think I get dressed in the morning: "Do I wear the short with the palm trees, the one with beer bottles, or the one with dragons on it?"
How I really get dressed in the morning: "(reaches blindly into the closet without turning on any lights and grabbing the first shirt I can grab)"
The good part of that is whenever someone asks sarcastically if I got dressed in the dark, I can honestly answer yes.
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And of course, because we're considerate of the folks who may come near, we do the obligatory sniff to make sure it's clean.