Blocking so many people posting such sad and overly intimate things about their lives. How are they okay with doing that? It just seems like such a private thing, and why are they foisting their MAJOR life issues that need professional help onto people just looking for chats and light conversation? Good grief. Please stop inflicting your hugely deep trauma on plain ol' people just looking to talk about trees and pets and holidays and their cool random tattoo. We're not qualified to help you.
@SaltyVeruca Then finding appropriate help should be a priority, not oversharing on social media, gahh. There are plenty of resources online to help them find appropriate help for their issue. And they are obviously online. It seems that many are going for shock value or just plain attention-seeking.
@Willowy I disagree. I think sometimes people just want someone to listen, anyone. Not everyone has access to help, I suppose or even knows how to start finding it due to being overwhelmed. I just scroll on if I can't contribute, I guess
@SaltyVeruca Social medis is a great place to access professional help. Probably one of the best places. So they should do that, and not expect Joe Susan to just be there for free therapy when they aren't equipped to do so. They should seek out real, actual, help.
@Willowy Well it's lucky you have it figured out. I don't think they expect solutions. Just listening. Which you're not willing to do.
@SaltyVeruca So many want solutions, or just fawning attention, that isn't taking into account how intrusive that is. If you truly need help, social media is a great way to find professionals that can be of real service, real help. Why not do that? Why claw and grasp at random strangers that haven't signed up for any of that? I haven't "figured it out', I just don't have the capacity or training for all of that.
@Willowy @SaltyVeruca just so you know, if they didn't tag you in the post? Then you cannot claim they claw or grasp at you. Your option is to 1. stay & help or 2. scroll by. Taking the third weenie option of "how dare these people expound on the pain in their lives?!" is not a really good path in my opinion. Empathy is the best human art, our highest purpose.
Maybe uncenter yourself? As I said earlier, if they didn't tag you then it wasn't targeted to you.
@Willowy Been awhile. I was just about to say hi.😀
@Willowy Sometimes people need to share, because it's anonymous, and maybe they can't talk about it with people they know. And since you don't know everyone's background, they maybe connecting with people who have had similar experiences, and who can help them.
It's always good for them to not feel alone. Social media is awesome for that. Many people don't care about your trees and pets or your tattoos, but want to really connect with others.
It's a big and varied world out there.😀 .
@Honeybee0427 @Willowy 🌺 it really is !
@Willowy Have you considered they're just venting on their own space and not looking for a therapist?
Just because you're looking for small talk doesn't mean that's all this place should be for, or other people are wrong for acting differently. You could have just blocked them and moved on.
Was this supposed to be a post about trees, pets, holidays or tattoos?
@tyote *sigh*, no, it wasn't. It was meant to convey my discomfort and aversion to people who feel it necessary to unload and foist their heaviest baggage on unqualified strangers. If you need someone to help you, seek professional help, not unqualified random people who have zero qualifications to get you what you need.
@tyote Also this isn't 'their own' space, it's a public forum.
@Willowy @tyote Actually, Jester @th3j35t3r, the owner and host of Counter.Social does specifically run this site for people to feel it is their own space, to curate, within the parameters of the TOS, as they wish.
@Pat_Walrond @th3j35t3r
Which I am doing.
@Willowy If you can't be Kind then block them
@Resister_Grandma I'm not qualified to help them, it's not about kindness, it's about what they feel entitled to inflict on others, with no regard. Like just vomiting in someone's lap unexpectedly and then expecting them to clean you up.
@Willowy @Resister_Grandma therefore, you cannot be kind. Now we understand that. Enjoy your block party.
@Willowy Has anyone actually asked you to "help" them ? Sometimes people just need to hear they aren't alone, life isnt all butterflies, unicorns and rainbows.You are under no obligation to respond to their pain but complaining about it is kinda sad , if you can't identify with something scroll on, block their names or do what you need to do but meanness is rarely productive!
@Tattoomonkey29 I'm not being mean by sharing my discomfort with their oversharing. We don't all have to go along with someone graphically spewing their traumatic issues in a public space. I don't happen to understand that tack, and I don't want to participate in it, and somehow I'm a bad person for then sharing my truth about those feelings? So unless you are a sympathetic sponge, you're mean? It makes no sense to me.
@Willowy Well there's the last 5 years of CoSo down the drain then
This isn't Twitter, nor is it Pandora. CoSo is conversation-driven & people can post anything & everything. Whether another person chooses to reply and/or get involved is their decision, but there are no rules saying "Thou shalt only talk about trees, pets or funny memes". It's real life and people have made real friends here
It sounds like you came here looking for Utopia and don't like that there are real lives going on
@BillyBones I'm just not equipped to handle that stuff. I resent it being foisted on me just by scrolling through my feed. That's it.
@Willowy Top tip - if you're going to bitch on here that CoSo is just for posting jokes & funny pics, and that Cosonauts with real life issues need to take it elsewhere because it brings you down, perhaps you're not in the right place.
And blocking people like me for pointing out that's not what CoSo is just emphasises the point. 🙄
@Willowy @tyote
While not all of us can help in all areas, many, many of us are fortunately in possession of reasonable amounts of empathy that we can offer a word of comfort or encouragement to posters who may be in need of either.
You are, I see, already curating YOUR own experience by blocking those posts which make you feel uncomfortable. Other people will curate THEIR own experience by posting about the things which affect them.
@Pat_Walrond Yes I am. And you can believe it or not, but I express empathy with co-workers and friends every day. I'm the 'mom' of our work team. I just don't feel like I'm qualified, or should be expected to provide an empathy receptacle for endless, anonymous, public trauma posted online. I don't see how that is unreasonable.
@Willowy Has anyone specifically tagged you asking for help or anything of that nature? If not, as with anything else on the Community Firehose, you read, block, or scroll past. Simple really.
Interestingly, Jester himself hosted a CoSo Open call Old Year's Night, I think it was, for people who might have been alone that night. It was an instinctive acknowledgement of how people may have been feeling that night, and a recognition that not everyone may hve cheerily been singing Auld Lang Syne
@Willowy I'm so grateful i didn't run into you back in July & August when i was posting about my dying dog. I can't imagine how much worse i would've felt seeing a post from someone like you trying to make me feel ashamed in being honest and confiding with people where i felt safe and cared about.
Oh and telling someone how to behave at a place you didn't create is OBNOXIOUS & rude. I'm glad that this community is the polar opposite of YOU. 😠
@Willowy After reading this thread, I am pretty sure it’s not them that need professional help 🙄
@Willowy Maybe they don't have anyone else?