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Enjoying every conceivable form of low-brow comedy but being lukewarm on fart jokes is among my most troubling mental health afflictions.

No matter how far ahead I get with work, I feel like I'm perpetually behind schedule.

Currently working under the assumption that I'm trapped in an Aesop fable and/or Greek myth.

Me attempting to function with my various mental illnesses firing on all cylinders.

It's a shame Scooby-Dum never became a permanent fixture in the Scoody-Doo universe (Dooniverse?). I mean, has there ever been a better foil for Scooby-Doo's raw intellectualism?

Depressive episode? More like “depressive series with an exorbitant number of seasons.”

Although it's never explicitly stated, I'm reasonably certain that RPG Real Estate is set in the present-day United States.

I drew this in response to Elon Musk declaring that "comedy is now legal on Twitter," which I believe happened roughly eight million years ago.

My shy, withdrawn nature is at odds with my brain never shutting the fuck up.

As a lifelong skeptic, I refuse to believe in the existence of the supernatural unless presented with ironclad evidence*.

* seeing the text "INSPIRED BY TRUE EVENTS" on the poster for a horror movie

I’ll occasionally wear a pair of extremely uncomfortable eyeglasses so that I can better appreciate my only comfortable pair of eyeglasses.

Anyway, I’ve pretty much mastered this whole “create your own happiness” thing.

When I was eight, I genuinely believed that the Ren & Stimpy episode in which Ren unzips his fly and proceeds to urinate on a board game would be the most shocking piece of media I would ever see.

From 2020. Wherein Sock learns that it's okay to not be okay.

From exactly two years ago. Wherein Cord and the gang prepare for Thanksgiving amid a pandemic.

Took a break to sneeze several times and blow my nose while writing a joke about my perpetually inflamed allergies, lest my authenticity ever be called into question.

Workdays are a constant struggle between needing to use the bathroom and not wanting to break productivity streaks.

The prospect of returning an item to a store frightens me more than any horror movie or haunted house ever could.

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