My latest comic. Wherein Cord and Sock discuss boundaries. #Comic #ComicStrip #Comedy

Me: *writes joke about subject matter with extremely limited shelf life*

Also me: *keeps joke in drafts folder until all possible relevance has been lost*

Oh, you think baldness is a BAD thing? Well, guess how much I spend on SHAMPOO...

It's, um, actually quite a bit, since I have extremely sensitive skin.

But guess how much I'd spend on shampoo if I DIDN'T...

New comic! Wherein Cord behaves in a manner that can only be described as "presidential." #Comic #ComicStrip #Comedy

Sure, the bird app killed my self-esteem, but it also provided with me a convenient outlet for making concern-inducing jokes that aren't really jokes about that fact.

My latest comic! Wherein Cord and Sock discuss generation divide. #Comic #ComicStrip #Comedy

Not sure if this is meant to indicate that I'm boring or sleep-deprived, but in either case, I am in complete agreement.

.

The brainstorming session that resulted in the creation of Burger King's Real Cheeseburger.

I like cheese, but I don't "average American" like cheese.

Excerpt from an upcoming comic.

Clearly, I've reached my creative apex.

New comic! Wherein Cord and Sock explore their individual relationships with food. #Comic #ComicStrip #Comedy

Pretty inconsiderate of this thunderstorm to jostle me out of a sound sleep. Doesn't it know the roof work taking place directly above my apartment already has that covered?

I'm not confident enough to fish for compliments.

(Unless this counts.)

Based on the synopsis, the forthcoming season premiere of Futurama will be the most relatable piece of media I ever consume.

New comic! Wherein Cord and Jenkins are befuddled. #Comic #ComicStrip #Comedy

Me dealing with a minor inconvenience.

Turning my phone off before going to sleep, like someone who actually receives phone calls.

Not to brag, but my allergies are so inflamed today that I'm about to fire this thing up for the third time in four hours.

Can't let #NationalVideoGameDay end without sharing what is objectively the best picture I have ever taken.