Remind me again which candidate was determined by the public to be mentally unfit for office

So...you're saying you're offended because you think the blue man with the fruit in his hair is Jesus.

You should read the Bible, bro.

I’m like Sam the Butcher, bringin’ Alice the meat / Your girl is shakin' her rump but I only pump the loveseat

[record scratch] Yeah, that's me. You're probably wondering how I got here, and frankly so am I because I did nothing wrong, the payoff was perfect, people are saying it's the best hush money deal they've ever seen, but I can tell you, I got here better than anybody ever has, everybody's saying it

I upgrade all my guitars-- tuners, pickups, knobs, you name it, I've made a personal decision about it. And even though everybody on the internet has an opinion about how a guitar should look or sound, nobody tells me what I can or can't do with them. I mean, really, nobody cares because they aren't their guitars.

Still, I'm glad we had this discussion about abortion rights.

Hey fellow nerds: I make in-universe #StarWars music. Like, if you went into a real cantina, what would you hear? That's the diegetic dianoga grooves we're trying to lay down.

We have six songs posted, all free to download. You can throw us some credits if you feel kind, but mostly, we wanna find fellow SW fans who appreciate what we're doing.

http://thekyberpunks.bandcamp.com

#cosomusic

.

"They just ran a poll in Germany, have you seen this? I won the poll, they're calling me the greatest. And we love Germany too, don't we folks -- great country, strong leaders, very famous, tiny moustache...made history that we still talk about today, and they love me there"

ACE Hardware employees wear red hats with white embroidery on them too, so this is good to know he'll have opportunities that feel comfortable

*RECORD SCRATCH*

"So, yeah that's me. You're probably wondering how I got here, and you know, it's a great story -- everybody's saying it, they say it's the best story they've ever heard, they come to me, tears in their eyes, 'Mr. Trump, please tell that amazing story one more time...'"

But what if your charismatic leader HAS done something wrong?

Is it possible?

Pretend it's Obama. Imagine it were Hilary. Could you conceive it?

If you can for them but not for him, Occam's got a pretty simple answer.

"We're gonna win so much, you may even get tired of winning. And you'll say, 'Please, please. It's too much winning. We can't take it anymore. Mr. President, it's too much.' - Donald Trump, April 12, 2016

Zuck just won the fight

Because I already have literally six or seven other chorus pedals, it took me 7 years, an Anderton's shootout, and a crazy deal to finally commit the definitive article. It went up on Mercari last week for $150 "untested" -- but that's because it clearly had never been removed from the box.

Wow.

I stayed up too late playing #StreetFighter6 but I also got to dragon punch a sentient refrigerator so I don't really have any regrets

Squire Classic Vibe Baritone Telecaster Custom arrived. Reduced relief in the neck, will be fiddling with saddle height for a few days, but I'm very pleased! #newguitarday

At last, the exhaustive, spoilerrific 10,000-word tale of our trip to the Star Wars Galactic Starcruiser is ready for you to read on my blog: https://bit.ly/katdanstarcruiser

If the news of its shutdown has you curious to know what it actually IS -- and I can tell you now, it's not a "Star Wars hotel" -- this travelogue to space will hopefully explain. It's your long-read for the weekend!

Recently overheard a member of 'the greatest generation' say they didn't realize the Village People were gay.

When I was 6, they were my favorite band. Too young to understand their act.

But as an adult? I mean...the range goes like

Not Gay
Kinda Gay
Gay
Clearly Gay
YMCGay

Make no mistake, I respected them more when I understood (and I still love disco today). But there was almost no subtext to their act and they got away with it.

Brilliant, yet blatant! How do you not get the point?

Long ago I handled community for Activision and had to explain why "free speech" didn't mean you could make in-game artwork of swastikas made of penises. This was my best analogy to try to reach people who insisted. Make it at home and not be arrested? Sure. Build it using someone else's art tool in someone else's environment? Nah.

20 years after LASIK, I need glasses again. It's okay, as I have reached the age where a) I can make my own decisions about specs appeal and b) it just makes me look aged and wise now.