I'm not participating in XMAS.

Wife: ?
Me: The alcohol abuse and gluttony followed by months of self denial and suffering. I am skipping the cycle.
Wife: Yeah, we gotta stayin shape for a beach in Hawaii.
Me: By 'we', you mean you. I'm in great shape.
Wife: Not if you keep eating ice cream out of half gallon containers like you are now...
Me: 1.5 quarts, shrinkflation and you take one shot of Wegovy and you're talking shit. 😂