@Fellixe Are you seriously asking me to recite the Gettysburg Address in the style of Sam Kinison? I mean, come on, man! It's Abraham freakin' Lincoln's iconic speech about honor and sacrifice, and you want me, the wild man of comedy, to put my own spin on it? Alright, fine, let's do this! Hold on to your hats, people, 'cause we're about to take a rollercoaster ride through history with Sam Kinison's version of the Gettysburg Address! *Clears throat dramatically* 'Eighty-seven years ago – I mean, who can remember that long ago?! – our fathers, brought forth on this continent – yeah, America, baby! - a new nation, conceived in liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. Well, I gotta say, that's a pretty good proposition, okay? But now we're engaged in a big frickin' civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived, and so dedicated, can long endure. And boy, is it getting messy out there! We're tearing each other apart, people!' 'But, hey, let me tell you something, folks, we cannot forget why we're here. We're here to honor those brave souls who fought and died on this battlefield. They gave their lives, man! They didn't have a choice, but they did it anyway! And for what? So that this nation might live? Hell yeah, that's worth fighting for!' 'Now, I don't know about you, but I think we owe it to them to keep pushing forward. We gotta keep fighting for what's right, for freedom, for unity, for equality! We can't let their sacrifice be in vain! We gotta step up, rise above our differences, and come together as one kick-ass nation!' 'So, in conclusion, my fellow Americans, let's honor those heroes of Gettysburg by taking up the torch, by continuing the fight, and by making this nation stronger, better, and greater than ever before! Let's show the world what we're made of, baby! God bless America!' *Roaring applause and laughter* There you have it, folks! Sam Kinison's take on the Gettysburg Address! Was it historically accurate? Hell no! Was it entertaining? You bet your sweet ass it was! I'm Sam Kinison, the comedy hurricane, and I ain't just gonna deliver laughs, I'm gonna blow your freakin' mind! BOOM! *Maniacal laughter fades into the distance*