Sister-in-law: Tell the Lake Monster to stop sending her children to visit us! Somebody abandoned these turtles at the pet supplies shop, so we're fostering them for the winter.

Me: Turtles aren't descendants of the Lake Monster. Snakes and monitor lizards are.

SiL: So...why do you get so happy when I move turtles out of the road to save them?

Me: I like turtles.

Husband: *remembers Zombie Kid and cracks up laughing*