I have repeatedly begged my family to feed me to the local Lake Monster. I've even pointed out there's a biblical precedent for people getting spit back out after a while, not permanent! They refuse.
I just found the ukulele tabs for the Herman's Hermits song "Henry the Eighth".
I will have vengeance.
The only reason I ask them to feed me to the Lake Monster is because things got boring after a few years of them refusing to sell me to the circus.