This is a video of ABSOLUTELY painful truths that I don't think a lot of white people think enough about. This spells things out SO beautifully and has some mouth dropping phrases that manage to clarify so much.

This was a powerful watch of absolute FACTS.

I don't use the word friendship often. I'm rarely friends with people. I have a lot of acquaintances and not a lot of friends. My definition of friendship is too complicated for most.

This video is great at partially explaining why.

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It's not so much specific to ant-racism work ... but about WORK in general. Work on the self.

I can't be friends with people who haven't done ANY work on themselves. I can't be friends with people completely unaware of other people's realities. I can't be friends with people who just have no clue of anything outside of themselves. I can't be friends with people completely unaware of the harm they cause. I can't be friends with UNACCOUNTABLE people.

Anti-racism work is just one part of that.

𝘔𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘤𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘺 ...

𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘢 𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘵, 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘶𝘴. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘴 "𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩" ...

"𝘐 𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦" 𝘪𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘢 𝘧𝘭𝘦𝘹, 𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘴 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦'𝘴 𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘲𝘶𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥 ...

𝘐 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥, 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵, 𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘣. 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘥𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥?

𝘋𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦 ...

This video does a great job of explaining what really needs to be understood about being a true friend to any marginalized people ... far beyond just Black people ... but any members of the #GlobalMajority ... be that disabled people, trans people, gay people, neurodivergent people, etc ... anyone who cannot benefit directly from white privilege.

There are nazis, white supremacists, klan members literally marching freely in the streets so at this point where you stand is important to know.

Friendship has higher stakes these days ... it goes WAY beyond just simple support ... Things are serious in the world and things are absolutely a matter of life and death for some people ... if you really have no concept of the fact that marginalized people have very different realities than you, then you're a shitty friend. It's really that simple.

Treating everyone the same makes no sense if you're talking about quality of friendship or quality of care. Everyone is different. Everyone has different concerns, needs, difficulties, challenges that shouldn't be ignored and need to be things that can be shared and discussed openly. Physical health issues, mental health issues, triggers, etc ... you can't just pretend these things aren't a part of who someone is and that you don't need to know about or understand them. That's not friendship.

The things that change the quality, safety, and reality of someone's life cannot just be ignored or treated as if they don't exist. That is just not how friendship, care, love etc should be between people. Frankly that's just awful and I would never be friends with someone that didn't want to put in the work to understand that or me.