#FirstCoffeeThoughts and Vir ❤️

If there is one sentence that perfectly encapsulates egotism, narcissism, lack of empathy, privilege, self-centering, lack of emotional awareness, selfishness, and even a leaning towards the spectrum of sociopathy, it's:

𝙄 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙙𝙤 𝙞𝙩, 𝙬𝙝𝙮 𝙘𝙖𝙣'𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪?

My first response to sentences like this, which are most often uttered by WHITE MEN, WHITE WOMEN, and overachieving BLACK WOMEN ... is:

𝙎𝙝𝙪𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙛𝙪𝙘𝙠 𝙪𝙥 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙘𝙝𝙚𝙘𝙠 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙥𝙧𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙡𝙚𝙜𝙚.

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𝘿𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙥𝙧𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙡𝙚𝙜𝙚 𝙞𝙨?

Privilege comes in a variety of shapes and sizes.

Privilege could be something as simple as being white or being male.

Privilege could also be being skinny or being pretty.

Privilege could also be having a high paying job or generational wealth.

Privilege can also sometimes be having a private education or even any education.

Privilege can be having friends or family who do you favors.

Privilege can even be having a healthy body and good genetics.

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Privilege is 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙖𝙣 𝘼𝘿𝙑𝘼𝙉𝙏𝘼𝙂𝙀 𝙤𝙧 𝙖𝙣 𝙀𝙓𝘾𝙀𝙋𝙏𝙄𝙊𝙉 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙗𝙚𝙡𝙤𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙖 𝙘𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙜𝙤𝙧𝙮 (𝙤𝙧 𝙘𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙜𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨) 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣 𝙖 𝙨𝙤𝙘𝙞𝙚𝙩𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 (𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙘𝙞𝙤𝙪𝙨𝙡𝙮 𝙤𝙧 𝙨𝙪𝙗𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙘𝙞𝙤𝙪𝙨𝙡𝙮) 𝙛𝙖𝙫𝙤𝙧𝙨 𝙨𝙖𝙞𝙙 𝙘𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙜𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨 𝙤𝙧 𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙘𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙖𝙨𝙨𝙞𝙜𝙣𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢 𝙝𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙫𝙖𝙡𝙪𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙤𝙧 𝙨𝙘𝙧𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙮. - Elaine Barlow

In America those things are first and often 𝙚𝙙𝙪𝙘𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣, 𝙬𝙚𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩, 𝙜𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧, 𝙨𝙠𝙞𝙣 𝙘𝙤𝙡𝙤𝙧, 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙩𝙝, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙬𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙩𝙝.

But in other countries it could be different things based on different systems of value such as caste etc.

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Being healthy is a privilege. Being able-bodied is a privilege. Having a job, going to school, being white, being a white male, being pretty, being thin ...these are all things that, in American society, carry weight and, more importantly a HIGHER LEVEL OF VALUE than others.

Even being heterosexual carries privilege, being married (and having kids) carries privilege because many of us live in a society that puts an inordinate amount of value on traditional roles and ancient beliefs.

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The #OvarianLottery is what first determines your category and that is not something you have ANY CONTROL over.

You cannot change who you were born to, where you were born, what kind of body you were born into etc ... all of those things determine your initial level of privilege.

It is important to note that privilege isn't set in stone. It can change or exist based on LUCK, VARIANCE, and OPPORTUNITY.

One can also change status at any time; rise or fall or gain and lose privilege.

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White people have this weird trigger where they think people are BLAMING them for having white privilege. I'm certainly not because 1. that makes ZERO sense and 2. you had no control over how you were born.

What people are usually trying to point out - that white people mistake as blame because they carry white guilt - is that you CHOOSE to be blissfully ignorant that you BENEFIT GREATLY from just being white even in lieu of other categories you may be in that DO NOT come with privilege.

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For example an UNDER-EDUCATED white male still has more privileges than an EDUCATED Black male.

Your SKIN automatically gives you certain advantages and exceptions regardless of other disadvantages you have.

White people also get triggered over the historical reality that white wealth was made PRIMARILY by KILLING, STEALING from, ENSLAVING, and OPPRESSING Black and Indigenous people for GENERATIONS.

You wouldn't have ANY power were it not for those varying levels of atrocities.

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No one is BLAMING anyone for having privilege.

What people are usually asking for is simply that you realize you have, and benefit from, privilege regularly and that judging other people from a position of privilege is gross and ignorant.

.. 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘤𝘤𝘦𝘴𝘴, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘶𝘯𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘪𝘳𝘤𝘶𝘮𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵. 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘰𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘢 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘣𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘴, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘭𝘶𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘰 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘤𝘵.

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𝘔𝘪𝘭𝘥 𝘴𝘶𝘤𝘤𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘣𝘺 𝘴𝘬𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘳. 𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘥 𝘴𝘶𝘤𝘤𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘶𝘵𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘷𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦. - Nassim Taleb "Fooled by Randomness"

Nassim Taleb is a Lebanese-American essayist, mathematical statistician, former option trader, risk analyst, and aphorist whose work concerns problems of randomness, probability, and uncertainty ...

I highly recommend reading his ANY or ALL of his work.

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𝙄 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙙𝙤 𝙞𝙩, 𝙬𝙝𝙮 𝙘𝙖𝙣'𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪?

There are a MILLION REASON why this sentence should never be spoken by anyone to anyone else. A good portion of these reasons should be obvious if you understand anything I just wrote.

Think about the things you do, think about how you are able to do them, think about all the things that went into your ability and opportunity to do them.

If you say "𝙄𝙩 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙙𝙪𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙢𝙮 𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙙 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙠", you may need to reassess the truth of your life, learn history, and honesty.

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𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘱 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘺 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘶𝘣𝘴𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴, 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘣𝘷𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘶𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘦. - Nassim Taleb

𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘷𝘢𝘯𝘵 (𝘥𝘦𝘵𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘴); 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥, 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘳𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘷𝘢𝘯𝘵 (𝘢𝘷𝘰𝘪𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘴𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘴) - Nassim Taleb

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#Incerto is an investigation of opacity, luck, uncertainty, probability, human error, risk, and decision making when we don’t understand the world, expressed as a personal essay with autobiographical sections, stories, parables, and philosophical, historical, and scientific discussions, in non-overlapping volumes that can be accessed in any order. The main thread is that while there is inordinate uncertainty about what is going on, there is great certainty as to what one should do about it.