In general I am a very passionate #stoic ... two words that many people don't think go together but #stoicism has never been about removing or disconnecting emotions from the self ... it refers to passions as emotions that are UNCONTROLLED and that lead people to make irrational decisions.

Epictetus and Seneca taught that emotions can cloud judgment and, as stoicism is the foundation of modern psychology, teaches REFRAMING techniques to keep your emotions from controlling you.

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Epictetus, my favorite stoic, was a slave and his writings on emotions, control, and how anger has no place in any high minded persons life were absolutely critical for me growing up in an abusive household. Discovering his work at a young age saved my life. Likewise, Seneca's De Ira (On Anger) is an absolute MUST read

http://www.sophia-project.org/uploads/1/3/9/5/13955288/seneca_anger.pdf

It is essentially philosophical and therapeutic advice on how to PREVENT anger. I highly recommend it.

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All that said ... I post a lot here on CoSo and I think that people who don't know me well think that my passion is the same as anger or stress or lack of control ... it is not. I am probably one of the most infuriatingly controlled people you will ever know. 🤣

I spent most of yesterday posting on CoSo and here is my #DayTimeStress from Oura. Most of my stress comes from my body dealing with #chronicpain and spikes of physical stress are usually from that.

Engaged. Relaxed. Restored

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Stoicism teaches embracing REALISM and especially focusing on recognizing what you can and cannot control. The only thing you have control over is yourself, wasting energy and anger on things outside of that is a waste.

Having passion about something doesn't mean anger and shouldn't if you have healthy emotional regulation.

𝘈𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘶𝘭 ... 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘭𝘺 𝘪𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘮𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘶𝘪𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘶𝘯𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥, 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘤𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴. - Seneca

𝘖𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘰𝘣𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦 𝘢 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺 𝘮𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘶𝘮 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘴𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘨𝘦; 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘢𝘥𝘮𝘪𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘵, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘴𝘰. 𝘞𝘩𝘰 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘥𝘮𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘧𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘴 𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘢 𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘤𝘦? 𝘞𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘕𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭-𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨; 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵, 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘶𝘭𝘨𝘦𝘥, 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘢 𝘷𝘪𝘤𝘦. - Seneca

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𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘦𝘧 𝘵𝘢𝘴𝘬 𝘪𝘯 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴: 𝘵𝘰 𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘦𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘤𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘮𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘪𝘤𝘦𝘴 𝘐 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭. 𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘥𝘰 𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘭? 𝘕𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘶𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘴, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘪𝘤𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘰𝘸𝘯. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘬𝘦𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥. - Epictetus

𝘚𝘵𝘰𝘪𝘤 𝘊𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘧𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘚𝘵𝘰𝘪𝘤 𝘱𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘰𝘱𝘩𝘺'𝘴 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭, 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭 (𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴, 𝘫𝘶𝘥𝘨𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴) 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘪𝘵 (𝘴𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘴 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘰𝘳 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴' 𝘰𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴). 𝘐𝘵 𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘴 𝘶𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘰𝘤𝘶𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘵𝘶𝘥𝘦𝘴 𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘤𝘪𝘳𝘤𝘶𝘮𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘴.

Having passion is great ... having control is great ... having both is even greater. ❤️

𝘈𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳, 𝘪𝘧 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘥, 𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘭𝘺 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘵𝘰 𝘶𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘯𝘫𝘶𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘷𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘵. 𝘐𝘧 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘳𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘮𝘦𝘦𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘧𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘪𝘵: 𝘢 𝘲𝘶𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘦𝘭 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘯 𝘶𝘱 𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥: 𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘮𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵. - Seneca

A dear friend of mine whom I met in the 90s and was a homeless artist at the time said to me when we met:

𝘈𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳, 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘥 𝘱𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘶𝘯𝘣𝘳𝘪𝘥𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘈𝘙𝘛 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘦𝘭𝘴𝘦. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘮𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘨𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘣𝘦 𝘱𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘰𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘥𝘶𝘤𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘴. 𝘖𝘶𝘵𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 ... 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘢 𝘸𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘦.

She wasn't a stoic but she was wise and I learned a lot from her perspectives. ❤️

She said being angry about her circumstances wasn't going to feed her or clothe her or get her out of where she was. She said that focusing on things she didn't have or couldn't have was a waste of energy that she could be putting into other things or that she needed for survival.

I told her Seneca once said: 𝘐 𝘮𝘢𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘐 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘰𝘳. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘴 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘐 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦.

And she laughed but agreed. It's all about perspective and anger clouds perspective.

Believe whatever you need to in order to get yourself through the day. That is your choice ... but don't judge others for their choice of REALISM. Realism IS NOT pessimism ...

𝘞𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘳 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺. 𝘊𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘤𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘳. - Seneca

𝘔𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘣𝘦𝘥 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘣𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘣𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘷𝘪𝘦𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮. 𝘕𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘮𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧. - Epictetus

𝘐𝘯 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘚𝘵𝘰𝘪𝘤𝘴 𝘴𝘢𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘳𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘺 𝘢 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘱𝘶𝘭𝘭𝘴 𝘶𝘴 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘮𝘣𝘶𝘴𝘩 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴. 𝘈𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘥𝘰𝘵𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘦𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭, 𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳.

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