#FirstCoffeeThoughts

I've been online since before the net was public. Long before AOL, when it was mostly libraries and just a few colleges.

I remember when the net was "empty" and people could only be found in pockets of communities that were built around commonalities and curiosity. When if there were more than 10 people on at one time in the same online space, it was a real party. 🎉🤣

I've been a participant, a moderator, and an OP when that stood for operator, not original poster 🤣

1/

But even in the early IRC days when "channels" were introduced and those pockets of people grew from 5 people, to 10 people, to 50 people ... there were mods and OPs who set the tone for those communities.

When the first "channels" became a thing ... so did the beginning of weaponizing communities against individuals or other communities.

This kind of thing became pretty standard as the net grew and BBSes gave way to online forums and forums gave way to social networks ...

2/

You can't control individual people's actions perse, but I do believe that people with a tremendous amount of influence are responsible for the energy they put out into their communities and how that energy may give rise to fanaticism and intolerance.

If you put out rage, anger, and inflexibility, you will attract like souls who thrive on that energy and use it to justify their actions.

You create pockets of toxicity that only breeds more toxicity and people who spread it.

3/

I've watched this play out over the years in many ways LONG before organized social media networks existed ... when pockets of people would gather around a common theme or idea and one person was responsible for shaping, moderating, encouraging, and controlling that channel or community.

When the community you are in charge of, that you are the "figurehead" of, becomes a cesspool of fanatics who act negatively in your name or are inspired by the energy you put out ... that IS on you.

4/

I've been watching a couple of people - one a clinical psychologist and one who is just a "person with good intentions" - slowly weaponize their followers on Insta and it's been a fascinating and horrifying thing to witness.

These are people who I followed because they had great messaging originally and who were trying to teach and even do anti-Blackness work. But now ... as their following has grown, they have turned towards satisfying both their egos and the mob that idolizes them.

5/

Work that was originally about providing space and grace for others, about accountability, and finding tolerance and understanding, has become fanatical ideas about "us" and "them" and both communities have become places where if you don't agree with the sentiment then you are the enemy and you get attacked, bullied, and harassed by hundreds of thousands of people all acting from a deliberately "groomed" mindset.

A psychologist should know better ... but also knows HOW to control others.

6/

Anti-racism work can stem from anger and rage about the state of the world ... that goes without saying ... but using rage to defeat rage isn't the way.

Using violence to counter violence or grooming others in order to combat grooming ... is madness. This is the pit you have been staring into turning you into itself.

You cannot have grace for others when you teach your followers that anyone "other" is the enemy in ANY circumstance. It just creates a new kind of -ism that creates division.

7/

Protecting your peace IS NOT the same as preaching intolerance.

Protecting your peace is about what you need to do for YOURSELF to stay healthy in body, mind, and spirit.

Preaching intolerance with rage (under the guise of "strength") to your followers is anger and hate and has nothing to do with peace.

If you set yourself up as any kind of OP, moderator, or leader of a community, you DO have a responsibility to consider what your "ideals" are creating and giving people permission for.

8/

If you want your space to be open, inclusive, welcoming, and to encourage healthy discussion ... then you need to put that energy out yourself in how you express your thoughts and ideas.

If you are angry ... If you are hurt ... if you feel a sense of injustice ... then the path forward is one that should primarily involve healing ... not further destruction.

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘶𝘯𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘯𝘫𝘶𝘳𝘺. - Marcus Aurelius

9/

I see a lot of white people engaged in anti-racism work and while that's really commendable and necessary work, I also see this unfortunate attitude where they believe that being angry, hostile, and confrontational with other white people makes them better allies to BIPOC.

It actually doesn't and really makes things worse.

It's a kind of white saviorism that is more performative than effective and mainly succeeds in making non-BIPOC more RESISTANT to listening and learning.

1/

I do appreciate many white people's efforts to be more engaged in tackling issues of their privilege and the damage they do, inadvertently or otherwise, to the BIPOC community ... but mainly I just see them creating more harm trying to prove they are "good people" and "good allies" because they take the anger they feel and direct it outwards ... instead of using that energy to fuel healing for themselves and others.

If you want to change the world ... start first with yourself.

2/

Angry, negative, combative people aren't the kind of allies I personally want, but everyone is different.

Some Black people do want that energy from their white allies because it feels like they are commiserating or joining in the Anger Olympics.

I don't want that energy anywhere near me. It creates and breeds toxicity and that is just not the way in my opinion.

People can only ever be themselves, so do you ... but in my world, my space, and my feed ... that kind of energy has no place.