The wife is home from biz travels! Yay!

She was appalled that I ate all of the snacks I said I purchased the day she left.
I didn't tell her I purchased even more and ate them, too.

I also didn't tell her I skipped dinner last night and stayed up until 2am drinking martinis.

I've become a really shitty bachelor.

She can't leave anymore.
I won't make it.