I read a story about a boy taking a girl to the movies and in the middle of the film says to her "Do you wanna kiss?" and when she said "EXCUSE ME?" he pulled out a handful of Hershey's Kisses and offered them to her, and I am forever grateful to him for this beautiful beautiful backup plan.

😂
Russian TV (if you didn't know, btw, all channels belong to "the state", with Putin being "the state") are employing astrologists to calm the public down with promises of USA's impending doom, Biden's death and the ruble becoming the dominating currency in the world

This is Igor Girkin, the Russian GRU Colonel under whose command the Donbas provinces of Ukraine were covertly invaded and then in effect seized by Russian armed forces, which fact was sold by Russian media as "civil war in Ukraine" and a lot of Western media gulped that shit down like a bunch of imbeciles, I'm sorry to say.

Anyway, in this video he's threatening Putin's top propagandist Wladimir Solovyev, the russkie Goebbels, promising to personally catch him when Russia goes belly up.

We are born into debt

Review: let me tell you that I was bitterly disappointed to learn that this book is in fact an instructional guide on how to make duck raising a profitable business. Never once anywhere at all does it offer insight on how to hold ducks accountable for their numerous crimes against humanity.

Is it me or does this steak look like it's about to invade Ukraine

Me: My leg hurts.
Dr: It's AIDS.
Me: Maybe I slept on it wrong?
Dr: Maybe you slept with a bunch of dudes

When the #fascist invaders from #Russia were leveling the city of Mariupol with heavy bombardments and razing it with tanks and artillery, children and old folks found shelter inside the Theater building. They made a large sign saying CHILDREN on the lot in front, but Russians dropped two large air bombs on the building anyway, killing tens and injuring hundreds.

Mariupol is under occupation rn.
They demolished the building yesterday.

#RussiaIsAFascistState

No thanks, but thank you for the greetings 😂

Stone Age hotties 😁

An MP from Saint Petersburg, Russia, is suing Putin for “fakes about the army”.

This “blasphemy” law was passed on Putin’s personal orders to scare the public into keeping their mouths shut about attacking Ukraine.

Thousands of ppl were thrown in jail for criticizing the war, some killed in assassinations in Europe and even USA.
Most recent case was a man getting 8 years prison time for listening to a radio program, neighbors called the cops on him.

Copy of the lawsuit:

Who’s been a bad sea turtle

Russia buys weapons from North Korea.
Excuse me, the Northernmost North Korea buys weapons from North Korea.

If you're Russian and you know it, say Sieg Heil

My collection of CDs be like

Use this when you need to get back at someone.

"Here, found your photo with your girlfiend"

"Honey, I think I see your mother coming towards our house!"

There's always this one friend who just can't be left unattended

Back when those body kits served a real purpose

Where's the mistake, teacher, explain!