TIRED: Able to spell "diarrhea" properly on the first try.

WIRED: Able to spell "hemorrhoid" properly on the first try.

For Lent, I'm giving up not making jokes about things I'm giving up for Lent.

Waffle HOUSE? Bro, I'm a millennial. Best I can do is Waffle Studio Apartment That's Still Somehow Unaffordable.

If there's one thing I hate, it's literally everything.

New comic! Wherein Cord expresses an appreciation for superhero cinema.

I'm one of those people who's really funny but crying on the inside, minus the "really funny" part.

HOT TAKE: A world in which I feel like my very existence is a cosmic joke and/or glitch is bad, actually.

New comic! Wherein Jenkins goes all out for Valentine's Day.

For Lent, I’m giving up not being funny.

I wish I loved anything as much as my subconscious loves sneaking typos that I never catch in a timely manner into my posts.

New comic! Wherein Cord once again contends with fairness.

From exactly three years ago - and every bit as representative of my emotional state as it was back then.

I won the never-wins-the-lottery lottery.

"Thank you for your payment."

Thank YOU for exploiting my desire for continued existence.

New comic! Wherein Cord and Sock explore the lighter side of dystopian living.

As a bald man, I think stores should only charge me for the body wash portion of shampoo/conditioner/body wash hybrids.

Well, I went two consecutive days without any sinus/allergy issues, so it’s only fair that today be spent blowing my nose on an endless loop and disrupting the space-time continuum with my sneezes.

"Aw, fuck, not again!"
- The makers of Fake Detective every time True Detective comes back for another season

New comic! Wherein Cord and Sock discuss the creation of a new SKINematic universe.

(See what I did?)

Wait, so I *shouldn't* say, "Samesies"?