I balance at least four untreated mental health afflictions on a daily basis, so don't tell me I'm not adept at multitasking.

PROMINENT CARE BEARS VILLAINS:
1. Professor Coldheart
2. No Heart
3. Guy Whose Heart Was Hardened by Childhood Trauma
4. General Asshole
5. Dude Who's a Dick Like 65% of the Time

TIRED: Able to spell "diarrhea" properly on the first try.

WIRED: Able to spell "hemorrhoid" properly on the first try.

For Lent, I'm giving up not making jokes about things I'm giving up for Lent.

@danialexis LOL! I’m still a few months off from that.

Waffle HOUSE? Bro, I'm a millennial. Best I can do is Waffle Studio Apartment That's Still Somehow Unaffordable.

@CrypticMirror LOL! I appreciate the "like" part, though!

If there's one thing I hate, it's literally everything.

New comic! Wherein Cord expresses an appreciation for superhero cinema.

I'm one of those people who's really funny but crying on the inside, minus the "really funny" part.

HOT TAKE: A world in which I feel like my very existence is a cosmic joke and/or glitch is bad, actually.

New comic! Wherein Jenkins goes all out for Valentine's Day.

@danialexis LOL!

@PowerpuffGeezer LOL!

For Lent, I’m giving up not being funny.

I wish I loved anything as much as my subconscious loves sneaking typos that I never catch in a timely manner into my posts.

New comic! Wherein Cord once again contends with fairness.

From exactly three years ago - and every bit as representative of my emotional state as it was back then.

I won the never-wins-the-lottery lottery.

"Thank you for your payment."

Thank YOU for exploiting my desire for continued existence.