Stonekettle
If you want a better nation, be a better citizen
Joined Sep 2018
May the wings of Liberty never lose a feather.
Today's the day, Citizen. If you never do your duty any other day, ever, in your entire privileged life, do it today. Not for yourself, but for all those who can't stand up for themselves, all those who gave their lives to defend democracy, and for the generations yet to be born. You want a better nation? You have to be a better citizen.
Today is the day. Now, get after it.
Live your life in such a manner that you never have to hide six-figure payments to multiple porn actresses from the mother of your children.
The state of America is such that the candidate with part of his brain eaten by worms is only the second worst choice in this election.
Looking at the state of America, I'm guessing people with dead worms in their brain may be a lot more common than we previously thought.
You know, I've had bad days.
But it was never sitting in court listening as they read your name into the historical record forever as "Vonshitzinpants" bad.
Arming Teachers is a bad, bad, bad idea.
I wrote about it in detail here: Bang Bang Crazy, Stand and Teach
https://www.stonekettle.com/2018/03/bang-bang-crazy-part-13-stand-and-teach.html
Marjorie Taylor Green should probably avoid any window higher than the first floor.
Those who fail Vladimir Putin seem oddly prone to sudden "accidents."
If Republicans DO manage to cut off their own Johnson...
...at least they have plenty of other little pricks to choose from.
We have to keep the jury in a former president's criminal trial secret so the defendant doesn't order his supporters to literally murder them. This former president, who is also a proudly self admitted serial sexual assaulter and was found liable for rape, is also currently out on bail for other crimes and is under criminal indictment in four jurisdictions for nearly a hundred felonies.
He is also a current candidate for president of the United States.
Maybe it's just me. Kinda feels like it.
You know what I'd like? Leaders who don't spend all day dreaming about killing us.
New essay up on Stonekettle Station: The Menace From Space.
https://www.stonekettle.com/2024/04/the-menace-from-space.html
Jewish space lasers. Rods from God. And a dachshund or two.
This is New York, there needs to be one flamboyant drag queen on this jury, just cracking out one-liners the whole time.
You know, I am so goddamn sick of Donald Trump. This guy has inserted himself into every aspect of our lives for years now. It is LONG past time for him to go the hell away.
Whether that's to prison or a plot next Ivana at Bedminster, I don't care. Just go away.
If you read social media, it turns out about 95% of the US population has extensive experience piloting container ships out of Baltimore harbor.
Every single Response to Jim Jordan should be: I will answer that question, Congressman, as soon as you explain to the American people why you were complicit in the serial sexual assault of multiple students who trusted you to keep them safe.
Joe Biden should offer to debate Trump. Then when they get up on stage, the moderator asks if the president should have total immunity to do what's best in the national interest and when Trump answers yes, Biden calls in the Federal Marshals from behind the curtain and has Trump arrested, hogtied, and dragged away while they just keep playing Trump's answer on the big screen over and over.
God will not save the Republic
So we're going to have to save ourselves. No Safety. A new essay up on Stonekettle Station:
Say what you will about Joe Biden, but at least on his watch the US Navy never had to hide the name of a warship from their Commander in Chief to prevent him from having a rage induced tantrum on the pier like a fucking toddler.
Donald Trump, expectation: I'll PAY YOUR LEGAL FEES!
Donald Trump, reality: I need you to pay my $642,000,000 legal fees.
Republicans suddenly outraged by ethical concerns and the alleged unprofessionalism of someone in office having an affair is absolutely hilarious shit but will most certainly pale in comparison to the sheer awesome level of staggering hypocrisy Newt Gingrich will no doubt produce later today.
Let the Fox News Pundit among us who hasn't had an extramarital affair with one of his subordinates cast the first stone.
Stonekettle
If you want a better nation, be a better citizen
Joined Sep 2018