One quick mental wellness note:
Yesterday was a rough one for the noggin. Lots of different factors involved. For one, I have a family member with bipolar-1 whose mania has a way of setting off my bipolar-2 lows.
But I was also dealing with "overshare withdrawal". While writing about violence last week, I mentioned something personal, which had come up in my noggin because I was writing about sex-based war crimes (and will be again soon).
Disclosure has stages of vulnerability, though-- 1/3
And a *lot* of us are moving through those stages right now. Some by choice, and some... not so much.
When disclosure of a terrible site of vulnerability has been forced upon you by external circumstances - when you have *no choice* but to see your trauma become a grand public spectacle, with everyone asking you about it, and weighing in on your responses to it - overwhelming, trauma-driven fury (X happened to me, and now Y can rot in hell) is very normal.
It should also never be policed.
2/3
Personally, I have a natural "withdraw" response when I'm dealing with despair in the wake of a disclosure, or general B2 depressive lows.
But I've also sometimes vented in awful ways.
Become obsessive over things that do my humanism no favours.
Been at my *worst*, in full and public view.
We're all carrying wounds--sometimes very raw ones.
It is an essential, if also difficult part of healing, to give each other grace after the worst in us comes out.
I hope we always can, and do.
3/3
You be and do whatever you need to be and do. I have watched you interact with others and interact with me, for a while now. You simply have nothing worry about, in regards to your being a decent, thoughtful, caring and kind human being.
In fact, in my humble opinion, you are a far finer human being than most are.
Just holding up a mirror from how an old retired firefighter sees you.
I am not be one of your closest friends but I am your friend.
Take it from me, you ROCK
Thank you for this deep kindness of a message, Scott.
It came at a time when I was feeling particularly tired of myself, so thank you so much for taking the time to write out some kind words & send them along the strange currents of the internet.
You are a powerhouse in many ways, & your communities are very fortunate to have you.
What a gift to know we're alive together in this strange world.
May the rest of the week as good to you are you are to ever so many yourself. 🤗
@MLClark
We all find each others for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Some just teach us a lesson and then move on. Some stay and share intensely for a while. But some are our spiritual tribe and stay as a part of hearts.
You have always had a "tribe" feel to me. I genuinely love knowing we can find each other on here and share the warmth of a friendship, not just an acquaintance