If this is all I have awaiting me for life (and it is) I may as well hasten on my inevitable ceasing to exist. This is simply torture, instead of non-existence.

Damn it, all I want is to go get Chinese across the street, but I have to stop and consider if I use that measely $15 if I won't have enough money in a few days to make it through the month.

I am so sick of not receiving enough aid to eat properly and/or often enough, or live my life in any meaningful manner.

I do NOT want to cook tonight. I would like to eat both now AND tonight. I can't afford $15 for lunch and $15 for something stupid like hot dogs for dinner for the next few days.

😩

Your daily reminder not to fall for #conservaderp #propaganda, please.

https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2022/04/hunter-biden-laptop-guo-wengui-bannon-giuliani/

Get deep with me as I ponder things.

Let's argue when we die, an afterlife exists. Let's use the common Heaven/Hell concept- Happy/Torture.

In a torture scenario, anyone would go insane in hours to days based on pain tolerance. You'd have no awareness of self= Madness.

In a happy scenario, you would eventually experience every single thing possible to do, and still have eternity ahead. Boredom would ensue= Madness.

What positive outcome to death can there be, given ceasing to exist sucks?

@kerrywth Thanks much. 😄

@awnaves Thanks! It's rough, but we all have a sense of humor about it best we can!

@NoahPaulLeGies Understood! Thanks!

@scotter810 Ah, thanks!

(Uh, don't know why CoSo rotated the image sideways. 🤷‍♂️)

My mom has #dementia but overall she's still pretty with it. As is always the case, she is getting slowly worse.

My sister's birthday is tomorrow. So, I bought a card and took it to my mom's care facility to sign.

She asked what to put, so I said, "Say, 'Happy Birthday! Love, Mom'."

She said, "No, that's too far, I don't know her." (The daughter she sees every few days.)

I shrugged and said, "Say, 'Happy Birthday' then."

Here's what she put:

@ChrisNelson32 Totally get it. There's so many games worthy of playing.

And trust me, Skyrim, with all its quirks and bugs and such, is truly amazing. So many things in it, even when doing something for the 100th time in a new playthrough, something new will crop up and blow your mind. Plus, so many ways to play (following the story, ignoring it, type of character, etc..)

Can't wait for the next installment of the Elder Scrolls! 😀

Since I messed up by deleting NBA 2k22 because I saw NBA 2k23 was "free" on Gold (only to find out it was a weekend trial), I had to find something else to do.

So I started Skyrim for the 2863744728th time. 😂

However, no joke- survival mode makes it intense at the start! Have a mod that redoes the skills and adds a ton- massive improvement.

Starting a bard/illusionist/thief, but speech and illusion actually have valid skills to use. No fast travel, no health regen. Cold. Eating.

Love it!

No brain, no body/no senses = No ability to process reality. No language, sight, knowledge, thought, reason.

There is no scientific proof of a spirit in any animal or insect. That's magic. Magic is fiction.

When you die, you cease existing.

Prayers are nothing more than talking to yourself.

Stop praying meaninglessly.

Start acting, by demanding robust, meaningful, common sense gun reform and $0 out-of-pocket mental health care.

@JKxZ Problem is, they aren't wants. They are dictated by the anxiety disorder I'm disabled from.

@JailTheTrumps Marketing design requires clients. How do they magically appear? How do I do that without phone/video calls? Selling things isn't guaranteed. What if next month I only have two clients? Has to be guaranteed income.

Impossible task- find me a way to make money.

Requirements:
Can't earn > ~$1000/mo.. Has to be guaranteed monthly income.

Can not work outside, using tools or in a dirty/dangerous environment (warehouse, factory), no physical labor, no OT, no weekends, no more than an 8 hour day, flex hours (no micromanaging my time), no travel (local also), no phones, no sales, no deadlines, no troubleshooting.

Work must be on a modern computer with internet, using creativity to create a product.

Dare ya.

@nbourre Thanks! That AI art is crazy in what it can do!

A #godofmusic #Prince "music video" I made using AI to generate art.

Colored pencil style was requested, keywords such as "night, rainy, urban, park, vibrant, mysterious, sad, lonely".

Song: Somewhere Here on Earth, Prince, Planet Earth (2007)

#music #AIArt

@nopuppet_007 Oh, thanks, but it's really just life circumstances. Feeling old and lonely, and I'm broke (because I'm disabled and can't find work I can do).

Tired of having no money and being beholden to family to survive, and being alone in dealing with it.

I need to vent sometimes since I don't have anyone to share things like that with.

Appreciate the sentiment, though!

I'm so tired. Tired my life was ruined by others. Tired of being old with no hope or opportunities. Tired of being broke, but living in a predatory corporate slave labor system while having specific work environment requirements that can't be met. Tired of being alone. Tired of being too smart while surrounded by fools.

The worst part is there's no escape. No positive outcome for life, no positive outcome for death.

Sigh. Even more tired after venting.