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I was just reading an article about how people have given up on dating apps and why. There were both women and men represented in this article ... but the opinions weren't so much about the apps themselves but more about the kind of people on the apps and the kind of people who use gamification and superficiality to find love. As I always say ... it's not the TOOLS is how the tools are USED and what kind of PEOPLE use them.

A tool is just a tool. In the hands of someone crazy though ...

@thewebrecluse A tool has its own influence , though. As they say, when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
To build a dating app that conveys an accurate impression of a person is hard; building one that resists people's wish to look better and more attractive than they really are, compensates for how little they know themselves, *and* turns a profit, is very hard.
The best dating app would have a drone follow you around, randomly recording your interactions with people.

@ImagineThat There is no such thing as "an accurate impression of a person" whether it's an app or not. Most people in the world have no idea who they even are and don't have any accurate sense of themselves. Every person who interacts with you will see you completely differently as well. Most people lie to themselves 24 hours a day so ... there is no such thing. An app is an app is an app. It does the basic minimum which is connect people together in some random, gamified, nonsensical way.

@ImagineThat Even a drone recording your interactions isn't going to be accurate for most people because again most people are performing some role 24 hours a day and have no idea who their most authentic self even is ... that person would be the person they are when they are completely alone, away from other people, and not suffering from fear or anxiety in the midst of social interaction where they are pressured or forced to be something they probably aren't.

@thewebrecluse Yeah, I thought of that. As in the Johari window, it's impossible for an individual to describe themself accurately, there's too much they don't know. The drone would add some of the "what others know" quadrant, but there are always unknowns.
On the other hand, I don't care that much about the deep unknowable self. The person I see is enough. I don't care what they do when they're alone, as long as it's not something vile like watching kiddy porn or voting Republican.

@ImagineThat I'm extremely wary of people who don't do the work to know themselves. That makes someone extremely vulnerable and easy to manipulate which means that person can become anything at anytime and you would have no idea who they are because they don't even know. People with no levels of self understanding or awareness make very bad partners period. If you don't care what people do when they're alone, you're asking for trouble, unpredictability, and potentially a very broken person.

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