Stop making self-care about you.
Self-care is never done independently. Someone has to watch the kids as you meditate. Someone teaches the yoga class that relaxes you. Someone gifts you with the book that is changing your life. A friend listens to your story. Self-care depends on the care of others, and the converse is true: taking care of others depends on self-care. So self-care is necessarily social, and involves exchange and building relationships.
https://psyche.co/ideas/learning-to-cook-taught-me-that-self-care-isnt-selfish
