Yesterday, someone I talked to on here, got banned. This is someone who made unfair claims and a ludicrous move to badmouth CoSo on Twitter. This is also someone who carries a lot of trauma and who is emotionally not all that stable and who lashed out. It could've been me: I carry a lot of trauma, I am emotionally not stable, and I have lashed out before. I wonder if instead of grace, I will be met with a ban if I act out because I am wounded.
I appreciate the ask, especially it comes from a place of empathy and concern for someone who is in pain.
I am not certain that the person you mention was banned or if they self-deleted reactively. Their subsequent behavior suggests that they did so. Regardless, their later decision to tag J on Tw and to make derogatory/incorrect statements about the community was regretfully harmful—to us and to her 😔
I believe you’d receive grace, and I don’t believe you would act that way.💜
@Minholkin
Perhaps I would. Thank you for your message.
@Minholkin @publickovacs I second this. ❤️
@Myana @Minholkin
Thank you both. I hope there remains room on here for the wounded and emotionally messed up.
Absolutely.
That describes all of us, to varying degrees.
It wasn’t/isn’t her woundedness that is the problem—she could have stayed by using the tools to detach from the views she disliked.
But she reflexively deleted and then made significant effort to denigrate the entire community to her Tw audience based on anger with a small few.
That is hurtful and harmful, and surely burned bridges despite that many cared and tried to help here.
😔💜
@publickovacs
We are all capable of behaving poorly and doing things we might later regret.
The continued escalation and attacking just perpetuated a cycle of hurt and further distanced her from folks who care and tried to offer support 💜
You can be sure that if you flailed in trauma-reactive way, folks would recognize and offer kindness—maybe via DM—but folks care and would respond.