Need advice.
Saw the husband of a friend having dinner with a woman. He saw us. There were other friends in the restaurant, so many people coming over to say hi to us. Not him. He thought we were saying hi at one point, but it was the friend behind him. Awkward.
He later left without acknowledging us
Do we inform his wife?
Was the woman not his girlfriend?
Are we not being good friends by not informing his wife?
@jurban Did the other friends see him too?
@NoahPaulLeGies
They don't know him nor his wife.
@jurban No, you might be not being good friends because you assume he's cheating on his wife. ; )
Were they making out or flirting or something? It doesn't sound like you're terribly sure that was his mistress.
Him not acknowledging you is a little weird, but I can think of scenarios. Maybe a business/official dinner of some sort?
I mean, it's not a good look, but is what you saw damning enough to stick your nose in?
@AskTheDevil
But, if you were out having dinner with your "cousin" wouldn't you stop by to introduce her? He knows we saw him.
Plus, he's pretty odd
@jurban I wouldn't necessarily jump to conclusions. But if you're concerned, maybe ask him. See how he responds.
I tend to be direct. It works more often than not.
@jurban Depends on the cousin. Some of my family, I don't like to let them around nice people, because they come with attached drama.
I think if you have a concern, you should be direct and ask. If they're cheating or something, they'll almost certainly get nervous when you ask. And if it's something else, you won't have messed with someone's marriage and possibly your friend group.
@jurban You can round about ask by bring up where you were and time and see if the wife knows if her husband was there. Taking a person to a restaurant where your friend group could be is I want to be caught behavior.
@Ruthat
Interesting point.
But, maybe he's comfortable because he's been doing it for a while.
I'm concerned that if she eventually figures out that we knew he was out with a strange woman she's going to be mad at us.
@jurban
Having dinner with a person may be something innocent, I mean unless they were making out or whatever. Personally, I'd say something to HIM, not accusing or anything, just "Oh hey I thought I saw you at --- a couple nights ago, and I was going to come and say hi, but you and your friend had already left." And that gives him the opening to say, "Oh yeah that was my therapist or my sister or someone I work with etc..."
@nonayadambidnes
True. But we see him only every couple of years. They live far away. That's also why it was odd to see him in town.
@nonayadambidnes
They were acting like a civil couple. No overt affection . But, he's a really odd character. She kept glancing over at me. I wasn't sure how to react. Awkward all around.
@jurban Ooooh, i think I wouldn't say anything. Not really my business.