Should the very worst outcome happen and you wish to escape to Canada - here's a short, but far from complete, list to of things you will need to know
@NorthernInvader hey! i'm canadian and i've never even tried poutine. don't put foods in my mouth.
unless it's cake. then that would be okay.
but no raisins!
@NorthernInvader that's okay for raisins in butter tarts. they're not cake and i can avoid them.
i'm glad you enjoy poutine. but poutine does not a cdn make. just sayin'...