Do you have a litmus test question?
Not necessarily for dating - I'm thinking about general interactions with new people. (But if the dating bit applies, go for it.)
Is there a question you ask that gives you a sense of whether there might be friction between you two in the future, but which is innocuous enough that the other person doesn't feel interrogated here and now?
https://pca.st/episode/3da86c2e-7a0d-4cdf-87fe-c6586570d8d1