: Ever since college people usually have been weirded out when they ask me about something and I answer that I don't really think about whatever it is and don't feel inclined to talk about whatever it is because 🤷♂️. Usually I've already done the thinking about whatever and have figured that it's beyond my capacity to affect in any meaningful way and that I don't believe talking about it in anything other than an academic sense is worthwhile. The disconnect I have with others is that more...
: ...often than not they are asking as a lead-in to a discussion they want to have because they want to talk about something that's bothering them. That said, if I am approached and asked to discuss something that's on their mind, then I am more prone to saying okay and having the discussion, at least having it up to a point.
Quite often such discussions turn somewhat or very heated from their end because they get emotional over it while I do not, and they start aiming their negative...
: ...and unmanaged emotions in my direction and then almost invariably at me, at which point it's become an argument and a vent for them because they're not liking their sense of powerlessness over whatever's bothering them. Often it isn't because they lost perspective during the conversation but rather they didn't have it to begin with. Then it turns into something of a therapy session, which I'm not wild about, for obvious reasons.
Humans commonly mistake other people not flailing about...
: ...and screaming and "raging against the machine" as not understanding, not caring, and even *being* the problem, and it's usually at that point in the conversation that folks tend to not like finding me at home. That's because I don't get flustered, angry, and such, and that's when they're spoiling for escalation to give them that emotional pressure release since they can't or won't go bananas on whoever they're actually bothered by. I'll walk and let them stew. They'll think about it...
: ...eventually, and they'll process it however they're gonna. Part of #AspieLife for me was putting together that that's how an awful lot of people operate, and they were doing it well before social media and before the internet. Hyde park is legendary for it, as are soap boxes in general.
I save arguments for when they're going to count, which to be honest, is not often.
#experience #observation #behavior #society #humans #humannature
@dratino: ^^^^ That right there, yes.
I find folks tend to get quite shirty when they find that what they're talking about is something you're already familiar with and perhaps even more familiar with than they are, and what hacks them often the most is that you're not openly, demonstrably, conspicuously, and vocally up in arms or whatever about it (like they are).
I know the kinda-joke is that we are "wired differently", but folks don't *really* get how deep that actually goes.
@thedisasterautist I've noticed in social situations I tend to let my logic lead my arguments which often leads to offending someone 😅 people don't understand i don't have an agenda and actually like when people show me a new point of view I hadn't considered