THIS IS A TEST OF THE EMERGENCY @DOG_RATES SYSTEM. IN THE EVENT OF A REAL EMERGENCY, YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN DIRECTED TO AN OFFICIAL @DOG_RATES SOCIAL MEDIA FEED. THIS IS ONLY A TEST.

Maple got her name because she's so darn sweet. 12/10 would eat her up for being so cute.

Oh noes! I have to.

Ah, so this is what Donald was thinking about during the 9/11 Ceremony when he disrespected the victims. I'm sure this concerns him far more than the ceremony. His own personal 9/11.

If you are a Chiefs or Chargers Fan, these are player jerseys you could own:

One of the worst things Reagan did was release clearly mentally impaired folks who could not care for themselves onto the street.

#politics

Reposting my better version with a grammar fix. Thanks, Shadow!

Fixed it:

Don't you think he looks tired...

CEO projecting the gravitas it takes to run 3 major corporations… into the ground.

I assume he posted this in his stained underwear in the basement drinking monster energy drinks and eating greasy pizza while shrieking “p0wned!”

<waits quietly for swifties to tear him limb from limb>

So, I hear it went well, and both debaters were entirely normal. #Debate24

Pictured: Trump in the spin room post debate.

Shade from the Apple News live feed. They compared him to Nixon talking about law and order. #Debate24

Per Apple News

I mean they are a bunch of pussies hiding behind an AR-15, so... #politics

And yes, they are deranged, and no, childless cat ladies won't be switching sides.

Dear sweet Mike, is there no end to the buffoonery? #politics

We all know that if he were near a cat clowder like that, he'd be dinner...

I'd argue we need a new "statue of liberty" made out of melted down AR-15s confiscated and destroyed...

Before "late stage" capitalism:

Today, they'd be figuring out how little fabric they could use to hold the flour and have the sacks sewn by 10 year olds in Bangladesh.

Do we need another emoji?

Children murdering children and the big debate is about "cell phones in the classroom."

Fire Louis DeJoy.

Oh good, the gift that kept on giving other people funerals to attend. Charge the parents... #gunviolence #GA