Spawn: I can't find my wallet.
Me: How does this always happen to you?
Spawn: Can you call it?
Me: *takes out my phone...

@p_terg it's

Q: If there are two potheads in the back of a car, who is driving?
A: The cop!

Yo mama teeth so yellow, when she smile traffic slow down.

Current Total User Count

162293

1. Elton John leaves Twitter citing "misinformation"

2. Elon Musk asks him what misinformation he means

3. Right-wing freak tells Musk Elton John's account was probably hijacked by his "marxist social media person"

4. Musk appears to agree with this

One might call this ironic - Jon Schwarz #RIPtwitter

Today's #morningcatreport brought to you by an unscientific quest to find out which of my cats CoSo is most like.

The cats want to know.

by Kasper Adsbøll

Made a #CookieMonster cake.

Dag nabbit rhymes with rabbit

Rabbits don't yell angry things with their butts, that's why they aren't skunks.

Your Internet security?

I have no issue with leaking stuff for projects that have been cancelled, but leaking stuff from a project that just recently got announced is pretty scummy.

pssst...just an fyi that #CoSonauts are the best people ever 😀 😀 😀

This time last week I had body pain, rigors, a cracker of a headache and a low grade fever. All were more intense than any I have experienced. Covid is not something I wish to ever repeat.