When someone offers to go down

Mister Fantastic: I think I've found a way to stop Galactus

GOP Senator: Hold on a second, how do we even know that Earth being eaten is a bad thing?

BOSS: Cut that tree down

LUMBERJACK: You blighted piece of shit, you call those branches? Why don't you make like an Ent and fuck off

When cis people do their best with pronouns

Ham is nature's biggest mystery because nobody knows how much of it I hid in my boss' desk before he went on vacation.

In the 90s you could pop into an AOL chat room and ask "Cyber?"
But now people just think you're checking to see who remains loyal to The Machines

I like how the West Wing is basically the same genre of competency porn as Star Trek, but with fewer transporter accidents

ME: "Hey, the 1980s called and they want their pants back"

STRANGER WHO IS SECRETLY A TIME COP: "They called?! That's a level 3 violation!"

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