*sigh*

It's not a customer ramp-up call with <named sales engineer 1> without the client attempting to do something that is broken on their end, not our product...

I swear, <named sales engineer 1> is the only one whose clients have problems like this.

"Oops, wrong architecture system."
"Oops, this system doesn't have yum configured properly."
"Oops, this system hung when we rebooted it independently of your product."

My kid is trying to bring a friend home. If anyone can spare a couple bucks, it’d be appreciated. (Sadly, I can’t use my miles to get the ticket.)

Help DJ come back to Portland - https://gofund.me/ebf030bb

Oh, FFS...

"My truck is cranking for a long time and never starting, can you fix it?"

"Yeah!"

Get it towed over, three days later: "Starter relay is bad, causing it to not crank."

"Wait, it was cranking, I know the relay is iffy, you just need to push the pedals really hard."

"Okay, we'll fix that."

Days later.

"Okay, you're all fixed!"

"So it starts up quickly now?"

"Tech says it cranks for a long time."

"THAT'S WHY I BROUGHT IT IN!"

Fix the thing I brought it in for please.

On the one year anniversary of the last time I was in the office - I am in the office.

Company has moved offices twice in the past year, during which time we were 100% work from home.

But my home internet is out, so, I guess I get to try out the new office!

Dang it's loud in here... (Don't have a walled off server closet yet, because we haven't needed one, so I'm just in the large open area with servers and loud AC.

The best thing to hear when joining what is about to be a two-hour videoconference at 6 PM my local time: "Our bandwidth is low, could you please turn off your video?"

*THANK YOU*! (It doesn't help that I use a front light because my room's lighting isn't great, so now I'm not blinding myself during the call.)

It’s funny when the local news anchor replies to you on Twitter *while he’s live on air!* (Was doing audio only, so that bit may have been prerecorded, but it was brethren live segments.)

Related, "fog lights" should never be used in traffic, except in actual fog. Any accessory lights that aren't factory-stock should never be used around traffic.

In most states, aftermarket accessory lights are illegal to use on road at all. In most states, fog lights are regulated the same as high beams.

They're not "accessory 'look cool' lights" - they're functional things that have a specific use, and "blinding oncoming drivers" isn't one of them.

If anyone on here is in InfoSec, and looking to join a great startup, hit me up. We're looking for marketing, sales, product management, and engineering.

Nearly all positions can be full-time remote, HQ is in Portland (Oregon, USA,) engineering is out of Cordoba, Argentina. (So for engineering, bilingual English/Spanish heavily preferred, local-to-Cordoba preferred.)

Sly move there.

So, his own lawyer admits that impeachment is the proper process when they are in office.

This process was started while he was in office.

LOL. You had it right the first time, higher standard!

Hey, dipseydoodle, *THIS* is the due process.

So the cheap Tesla fell through. Now I'm looking at a Fisker Karma…

*SOMEONE STOP ME, QUICK!*

Coworker typoed the name of VMWare's management software.

I like his name better: cVenter

Annoyingly, in the week between us reaching the agreement to buy and today, the one local one that I was also interested in (more miles, more money) sold… :-(

"Just to let you know, i was willing to pay your original asking price of $(1000 more than what he admitted he just sold it for) and deal with recall myself. And if you had contacted me a little earlier today, i could have made it up there today. But hey, "easy way out"… good luck selling, because if it falls through, i'm no longer interested in dealing with you."

I hope it falls through and he has to accept even less than our agreement from the next buyer, you slimy Seattle bastard.

Bastard just sold it. "buyer is going to pay ($1000 more than our agreed, $1000 less than his original asking) to take it today without the recall work done.
"i had it listed for over a month with no bites, then you called last week, and this other buyer today…"

My final reply may have been overly snarky:

Fuckin' Seattle!

Had arranged to buy a used car from someone in Seattle. Based solely on ad photos and a phone conversation. During the conversation, seller offered a $2000 discount off his asking price, and stated that he already had a scheduled maintenance appointment in Seattle to have a recall repair done. If i was willing to wait, he would get that taken care of. (scheduled for later this week.)