@Alfred Create a picture of Jesus Christ and Santa Clause on vacation.

The one video I took last night #GeoStorm

I heard so many people say that you see Aurora is better through an iPhone than with the naked eye and I always thought that sounded stupid but tonight I got the proof that it’s 100% true

Wooooooooowhaaaaaaaa

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Headline : Person on fire outside courthouse where Trump's trial is underway
Me : "Please let it be him, please let it be him..."

Apple Watch : It's time to stand up!
* goes to pee / finishes peeing *
Apple Watch : You did it !
Yes I did, Apple Watch... yes I did.

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Updated profile pic. Obviously not really me, but then again, the other pic was almost 20 years old so was it really me anyways?

Because I report some random news at random times. One of my many qualities.

Earthquake app showing two major shakes in Taiwan.

Over 500 years BC, Aesop created the story of the tortoise and the hare and for over 2500 years, hares have had this bad rep of losing races to tortoises and... and... and... I dunno why i'm talking about this

People who feel like you have to justify to them why you did not answer when they called are the absolute worst.

I have no video and I have no proof, but I swear there was a squirrel doing back flips on my lawn earlier.

Got my eye on this girl at the restaurant

Carrot cake is pretty damn good, but I still feel the first person to come up with the idea was on heavy fucking drugs.

Even with an article that has circle around the edits, I still can't tell exactly what was photoshopped with Kate's picture.

That was your weekly episode of Stevo bitches about something

Watched the cartoon so had to give The Last Airbender series a chance. I’m amazed at how they got so many things just bang on. The one thing I don’t like which is pretty major is the casting of Ang. Everyone else feels perfect or close but in his case it’s just a terrible casting

My ex-girlfriend used to tell me that all the time